Soongyu - For All To See

:: Always ::

   Though honestly Soonyoung hadn't expected the conversation that came next.

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   "So..." Hansol started as their bedroom door closed, leaving just Hansol and Soonyoung with each other's company - a faint chill circling the room from the open window.

   Soonyoung cringed at the memory of why the window was opened in the first place as he leaned over to pull it shut once more; the bedroom smelling like fresh air and nothing else.
   He turned around to glance at the younger male who had his hands in his front pockets, rocking back and forth on his heels as he glanced everywhere but at Soonyoung's face, the awkward tension between them growing with each passing second.

   "H-Hansol, um..." Soonyoung brought his hands together and fiddled at his fingers, unsure of how to start properly, "I'm sorry for keeping it from you."

   Although he'd apologised already, he felt like he had to again.

   Hansol sighed and moved towards Soonyoung, reaching out his arms to wrap them around his neck, pulling the slightly smaller male closer into a hug, "It's alright, hyung. I get it, I really do. I didn't mean to react the way I did... I just, it caught me off-guard."

   Soonyoung smiled in relief, feeling comforted by Hansol's warm embrace and his words. Lifting his own arms he hugged back, his arms circling round Hansol's waist. They stayed there like that for a moment, just allowing themselves to be comforted by one another. Neither of them liked conflict, but then again, who did?

   Eventually they parted from one another and decided to get ready for bed, changing into sweats and loose fitting t-shirts and after going to brush their teeth, they were back in their room sliding into their individual beds with the lights off - though neither of them slept immediately despite their fatigue.
   "Hyung?..." Hansol questioned into the darkness.

   Soonyoung rolled onto his side so he was facing Hansol's side of the room, "Yes?"

   "How do you do it?" Was all Hansol asked.

   Soonyoung's eyebrows furrowed slightly with confusion, "What do you mean?"

   Hansol let out a shaky sigh, "How do you cope with having feelings for another member?"

   The question stumped Soonyoung for a moment, but he took time to consider his answer, "I honestly don't know... I didn't realise I was capable of loving another member in that way because it's not really something you'd ever think about nor consider, right? Anyway, Mingyu confessed to me from what felt like out of nowhere and at the time I'd only ever seen him as a brother. So it completely threw me off..." 

   Soonyoung paused, curling his hands in front of him as he bundled his covers to his chin, "But before I knew it, I found myself watching him whenever I could. I'd think about him constantly... I'd kiss him back if he advanced. Then I realised his confession had changed everything and I began to feel the same."

   There was a momentary silence between them until Soonyoung spoke again, "I don't know if I can explain how I coped since Mingyu was the one who struggled through his feelings first. I simply started liking him back after he'd already confessed, you know? So it hasn't been as hard for me although I don't like keeping secrets from you all."