Lotus || April CampNaNoWriMo 2019

i. surviving

You're so beautiful

I'd rather drink you up

-*-

When the storm subsided, it was evening again and the sea was more endless than Lien ever could have imagined. There were no borders on the nothingness in which he was floating, no landmark in this ceaseless infinity. He looked at the darkening ash of the horizon line, trying not to think too hard.

He was alone on the deck, just him, the sea, and the waning sun. Violet was below deck sobbing over Mei Lin's limp body. Lien had tried to comfort her, but she had batted him away, accepting instead the bony, white arm of the mysterious boat-dwelling woman, who leaned her cheek on his wife's shoulder as she cried, whisper that everything would be alright. He couldn't stand to look at them all.

Mei Lin would be okay, she was just knocked out. The one Lien was worried about was He Shui.

The little boy was asleep in the bedroom with Nai Nai, his wound spitting pus and blood no matter how many times Violet and Lien tried to clean it. The rot was undoubtedly spreading up his leg. Lien could see his veins growing tenser, his skin decaying to lifeless gray. Yet, Violet would not allow Lien to move the boy away from the room.

Well. Now she was busy crying in the other room, her sobs loud enough to mask the sounds of Lien's footsteps. He thought to himself that he ought to try again while she was otherwise occupied, wooden door shut behind her.

The sea had calmed dramatically, though the sky remained cool and dark. Clouds drifted past, silvery like strands of gray hair. The smell of salt made him feel lightheaded. The waves were choppy and quick, rocking the boat chaotically from side to side. Lien had to put out his hands as he crossed the deck like a gymnast trying not to fall off a balance beam.

He opened the door to the cabin and tiptoed down the creaky wooden steps. All was quiet below. He stepped carefully, hugging the wall so the turbulence of the sea wouldn't cast him down to the floor.

The cabin of the boat was just as Lien remembered it from the one time he had been on the boat as a boy.

Before his grandfather had died, he had taken Lien out on the water one time. Lien didn't remember much about the outing, other than that his grandfather, always a reticent man, had hardly spoken a word to him the entire time. He also remembered throwing up over the railing of the boat and crying that he wanted to go back to the shore.

Maybe that was why Yeye had left the boat to Nai Nai instead of his grandson. He'd seen a weakness in him early on.

By the time Lien reached the bottom step, he could hear the quiet noises of his family in the closed-door rooms: Violet's gentle sobbing, Nai Nai's rumbling snores, He Shui talking to himself in a musical, unfocused voice. He could hear Lotus, too, singing something soft and slow, soothing, certainly not in English although the song was muffled in Lien's ears.

Lien approached the first door, shuffling to ensure that his feet would make no sound. The lights had gone out during the storm, and the cabin was robed in grayish shadows. He pressed his ear against the door behind which his grandmother and son were lying in bed. He Shui was speaking so indistinctly that Lien still could not understand him. He twisted the doorknob and stepped into the room.

It was darker inside and smelled worse. The stench brought back to Lien the horrific smell that had awoken him last night, setting off this entire nightmare.

He Shui was lying on his side on the right side of the bed, Nai Nai lying on her back next to him, asleep. The little boy moved as if to sit up, but wasn't able to lift his head. Lien's heart clenched. He took a deep breath. There was Violet and Mei Lin and his grandmother to think about, he reminded himself. He needed to protect them.