Beautiful Illusions (Chris Motionless)

The Insider's Look (A/N)

It’s the moment we have all been waiting for, at least I hope, the insider’s look. Yay! I’m excited to write this because I think its fun to let you guys know some things that you might not have noticed or do not know. I will try to not leave anything out but it’s okay so we’re going to start with some cut and dry facts about this story. I’m going to number them so here we go:

Victoria was the reason why Chris wrote City Lights (obvious)

Jace and Dylan didn’t exist when I first came up with this story. I made them up because I didn’t want Victoria to be alone.

When Chris listens to “The Lover” by Alesana in one of the chapters, it foreshadows him seeing her. “Is it her? Could it be? Should my eyes believe what they see?” Pay attention to the lyrics, they mean something.

In the first version I wrote, Victoria never knew about Chris’ feelings so I reworked it to where it turned out that Victoria knows about Chris’ feelings for him but does nothing about it.

It’s ironic that V listens to “Heaven Knows I’m Miserable” because of the Puppets 3 lyrics, and that’s why did it. Because I’m cute (I’m not)

The person that Jace goes to see in New York (Maya Warner) is also in A Wicked Game to Play (Ricky Horror)

Dylan’s character is solely based on one of my dearest friends expect she’s 17 and she’s a girl but everything else is her, especially the anime part.   

 Jace is asexual.

Chris is the only one that calls Tori anymore, everyone else, including Kelly and Ange as well as Victoria’s parents call her V (because of Jace)

Chris sees Jace’s bracelet in “If You’re Cold” that has the asexuality colors, but he doesn’t know what it means.

Angelo knows Jace’s sexuality but doesn’t tell Chris.

At first Victoria wasn’t going to have a stepmom and was going to be an only child but I changed it so she won’t seem so alone.

Chris giving his coat to V in “I’ll Keep You Warm” is his subconscious saying that he still cares about her.

I hurt a lot of feels in this stories.

I cried a lot when thinking about and writhing this book because it’s something that I have a connection with and that will be explained later on in the insider’s look.

I drank through two boxes of chai tea when writing chapter 6-11. I felt like that was important to say.

The weather plays a huge part in this story. It’s symbolic.

Chris writes the lyrics to Puppets 3 in one of the chapters.

There are a bunch of lyrics scattered throughout the entire book.

 Chris remembers what his dad told him about walking through fire in one chapter.

Alright now I am going to start talking about how this story relates to me and why I wanted to write it and how it came to be what it is today. I’m going to go to my personal life for a moment now.

But for now I want to say the first chapter I created when the idea for this book first came to me was the sex scene. I’m being so honest right now. I was coming home from work and I kept listening to Angel Eyes and it all went from there.

I know that some writers say that they don’t put themselves into their story and I feel like they’re kind of lying because in fiction, the writer mostly creates the characters. Some characters might have some traits of people the author has experienced. For the most part the characters created by the writers are from the writer’s own mind. So to me, they kind are the parents of the characters though they are not really, writers create them. Also, writers write about they know. I know I do, and I know this pain that Chris and V went through because I’ve gone through something like this. I’ve been hurt in a form that Chris has so I feel what he’s felt when he wrote the whole Puppets saga.

It all started in spring, in theater. I grew close to the guy that I worked with and he was the same one that my character in the production loved. So I was always around him, and he was so sweet to me. He took my mind off of things because during that time my parents were disputing so he helped me through all of that. And he was a big flirt. I thought he liked me, because I sure did like him. Thing was, he had a girlfriend and didn’t tell me. He played me.

So I took all that rage I had and put it into this book because no matter how much I tell myself that he isn’t worth my time, I can’t help but still like him. It’s like I want to hate him but I can’t because he was someone special to me.

Even though this story is completely different from what I went through, I felt like some aspects related back to me as the author.

Now these are some of the songs that played a big part with this story:

Endlessly She Said by AFI

Baby You Wouldn’t Last a Minute On the Creek by Chiodos

Apology by Alesana

The Lover by Alesana

Pieces by Red

A Lunatic’s Lament by Alesana

Curse of a Virgin Canvas by Alesana

You and I Unison by La Dispute

City Lights, Cobwebs, Puppets (all three of them) and Fatal by Motionless In White

There are more but those are the main ones.  

Thank you all so much for reading I hope this is something that you enjoy then maybe I can do these for some of my other new stories. If you guys have any questions for me I will be happy to answer them but as for now this concludes Beautiful Illusions. Thank you all so much!!!