Kissing Clouds | Short Story

Chapter 10

My eyes were opened and he wasn't lying next to me as I hoped. I wasn't in the hotel but in my room. No sunlight came through my window, the curtains blocked it all out. It was just me, lying there.

I rolled onto my back and just stared up at the ceiling with this overwhelming feeling that sat on my chest. I couldn't breathe and I felt like I was dying, that I was being choked so I sat up.

I was gasping for air and holding my chest. Then, I started crying, again. It never failed, it was always just a dream.

Once I came back to reality, I went into the bathroom and flushed all the feelings away. I washed my costume on my body and threw on my protective barrier before I went out to the world to repeat another day.

I got on the bus and six stops later, there he was, Ramon Marelli. He sat in front, per usual. Before he sat down, he looked at me for a brief moment but before I could give him a smile, he turned away.

I rode the bus and listened to my music until it was time to get off. As always, I was behind him and he held the door open for me but he didn't look at me.

I said thank you but he probably didn't hear it. I watched as he went into his class and then I went to the Student Union room and just sat there, alone, until it was time for math where I was going to see him again.

I sat in front of him, like always and maybe I was crazy or just dreaming again but I felt him staring at me.

Who was I kidding? I only wished he was. After class, we both walked to our bus stop and just stood there.

I wanted to speak to him. I wanted to hug him and tell him that I dreamt that we were in love. That, in another world, we were meant to be. I was his and he was mine.

But my dream was right, I was lonely. I created those dreams to feel a bit less lonely. It's not like I wasn't fine on my own or didn't love myself because I did. I just wanted someone to love and to love me all the same.

I wanted to tell him, that I loved him but instead, we stood there.

Never uttering a word to each other.

But I couldn't help but think that maybe we were supposed to be lovers.

Or maybe I was supposed to be alone.

If love existed when I lied down and closed my eyes. Then I hoped to never wake up.

I'd just be kissing clouds.