Chapter 1

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Dasia sits by the window of the balcony, overlooking the cars and lights speeding through the city. She has a cigarette in her hands but it's unlit. She puts it in her mouth, drags in a deep breath and lets out a sigh. She turns and takes a look at the bed she just shared with him. Next to the bed, on the night stand are two pills she needs to take. She knows she must take them to survive. She knows that without those two saviours, she would become unraveled. Her reluctance is known only to her, but she must get up and take those before any other decisions has to be made.

She drags her feet to the bed, lifts her companion's hand and places it on his leg, sits on the bed and swallows the two pills. Now she needs at least 15 minutes of sleep for the medication to take hold. It always seemed like 15 minutes were too much but it was needed. Anything before would result in horror for her. She could never function properly right after taking those things. She needed 15 minutes of silence, and so she laid down next to the cold body. Relaxing just for a bit to gain her composure.

Where she came from they never gave her time to recover from the meds. She didn't get her time to recharge after taking the allotted pills. She was forced to 'function' and mingle with the 'others'. Now that she was on her own she can do things differently. She can take her pills in quiet, relax and then face the world with smiles and hugs. She looked at the man laying next to her and shrugged. He was pretty handsome but he just was not the one she was looking for. 'All of them had to go', her mind whispered, 'all of them did this to you'. She knew where her thoughts was going and rolled over on the bed to face the window she abandoned a few minutes before. He was not the one but all of them were bad. Bad to the core and all of them had to pay. She closed her eyes succumbing to her pills and hoped for a better day.

Dasia Santiago de Braggo touched her gown and tried to fix it best as she could. Today was not one of her good days. She already had a screaming match with a nurse and her roommate tell-tell attitude was not helping her nerves. Today was just not a good day. Today was also a few days before her 18th birthday. She was dreading that moment. Now the young doctor wanted to chat with her alone in his office. She sat, fixing her nightgown, hoping to look presentable enough. She had a bipolar issue. One her family could not take time to understand, so they brought her to this institute, hoping she would get the help she needed. It was not like she was stupid, she just had serious cases of dealing with the pressures of life and staying happy all the time. Personally, at 16 years, she had created a way to deal with it until the night her father and mother decided it was just too much.

Daisa had sneaked out the house to meet Ricky. Ricky's darken skin glistened in the night when the light hit it just right. She loved 'Ricky', and he loved her, or so she thought. She met up with him and they headed to another friend's house. There she overheard him telling the group that he was tired waiting and ready to deflower her. He just wanted to be her first then it's 'bye bye Dasia'. She ran out crying and with uncontrollable rage, she got to her house and broke every item she could find that was not bolted down. She screamed, threw items and in her state she broke her parents flat screen plasma television and Mazda 323F car.

She guess that was a bit too much for them so they carried her to the home thinking it would be more helpful than what they were doing. Now she sat in the cute doctor's office feeling like the day her parents abandoned her.

"Dasia, how are you doing?" Doctor Sylvan asked.

"I am okay. Just tired".

"Dasia, what happened with you and the nurse?"

His voice was so smooth and calm as he spoke to her. She felt herself warming to his voice and wanting to share her thoughts. She never liked to share in the group therapy, but with him she shared when it's just them alone. I'm the doctors office.

"Sylvan, nurse Manne insisted I attended group workout as soon as I took my pills but I know myself. I need time to relax after downing those meds."

He smiled as she addressed him by his surname. He insisted she call him by his first name when they were alone but she opted for his surname. Loved how it rolled off her tongue. Most days she had a handle on her anger and her moods, but her birthday created a hole in her heart each year. Every year she would hope this would be the year she left the home and was reunited with her family but it never happened.

"Dasia did you take your pills already?"

"Yes Sylvan, I did."

"Here, take these. These will help you to relax a little more, and I will write you a note so the nurses won't bother you for the rest of the day, ok?"

He placed two more pills in her hand and a glass in the other. She took them and sat back closing her eyes for a few. Sylvan led her to his patient bed, she knew this as she felt his hand guiding her while her eyes were closing down, and gently placed her to lay down on it. She welcomed his touch. She trusted him and she also had extra medication in her system which helped altered her emotions. This was the first time Sylvan took his finger and slipped between her legs while she laid down.

She knew this was wrong but she could not move. She could not scream. She was a virgin and he knew. She felt the passion rising in her even with the extra meds. She knew it was wrong but what he was doing felt so right.

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