𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐭𝐬 𝐧' 𝐜𝐢𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐬 | 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 ♡

𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐞

~♡~
Sodapop

The doctor said that Molly hadn't improved all that much since the incident. The only thing she had accomplished so far was waking up.

She had a minor concussion, and it hurt too much for her to walk because of the gashes in her legs. She was in an awful lot of pain most of the time. I felt more than just 'bad for her'. She had never felt physically pain like this before, and it was even worse knowing I couldn't do a thing about it.

I didn't know what to do, or even what to think anymore. Were we really gonna lose her? I tried not to think about things like that, but sometimes I can't help it.

I gaze over at her as she holds on to the three things that matter the most to her; my sweatshirt, the blanket Mom had made for her when she was born, and a little teddy bear that Dallas got for her. She slept while wearing my sweatshirt on the nights I couldn't be there. It was huge on her, but everyone thought it was adorable.

I spent all the time I could with her. Every night I would lay next to her in the hospital bed, and as we stare at the ceiling, I'd catch her up of everything that was going on.

I did everything I could to make her feel safe, even if it meant taking off work.

Dally hated little kids, and it amazes me how much of a soft spot he has for Molly. I know he'd do anything for her. He'd probably die for her too.

But Molly loves him a whole lot. Like another big brother. They've always been close. It was just Molly, Dal, and my mom for most of Molly's life. It was all she knew, and all she wanted. She was the happiest girl in the world until our parents passed. She's never been the same since.

"Did he get thrown in the cooler again?" She managed to ask.
I chuckle a little.
"No, Honey. Dally's gonna be alright. He'll be back by tomorrow." I explained.

I pushed her hair behind her ear.
Her bright blue eyes glistened in the sunlight that was through the window. She had mom's eyes, and her smile, too. But I knew I wouldn't be seeing that smile for a long time.

She was a lot like Johnny now. Scared and fragile, lost and alone. Her hands were always shaking, and whenever someone would touch her, she's flinch, or move away.

"Soda?" She mumbles.
"Yeah, kid?"
"Can you- read me something?" She whispers.
That one sentence almost knocked the wind out of her. She's real weak.
"Uh... yeah, sure. Anything for you." I smile nervously back at her.

I wasn't all that good at reading, that was Pony's thing. He and Molly would always read books and watch movies together. It just wasn't my thing. I'd probably mix up all the letters while reading to her.

I turn and tell Steve to run downstairs, and grab a book from the gift shop. He nods, and trots out the door.

"You feelin' any better, Molls?" Two-Bit asks as he walks over to Molly's bed.
She nodded.
I knew she was lying, but I didn't say anything. Maybe once Pony and Dallas came back, she'd actually start to feel better. Maybe.

Steve jogs back in a few minutes later, and hands me a book. It was dark red, with big fancy letters spelling out: East of Eden. The movie was alright. I think I only liked it 'cause James Dean was in it, but it was pretty good.

I opened the front cover, and flicked through the first couple of pages, until I got to chapter one.

I began to read, and I stumbled on almost every word. I haven't read since I left school, which was almost a year ago. Molly was patient with me though, and kindly corrected every word I pronounced wrong.

"Alright, I can't take this no more." Johnny utters as he lifts himself from his seat. He takes the book from me.
"I'll read." He conveys, and motions for me to sit where he was before.

He sits down on the edge of Molly's bed, and reads to her, better than I could ever dream of doing. I could be upset about it, but I was used to it. I was dumb. I didn't use the word to bring myself down, it's just something that came with having a face as gorgeous as mine.

I listened to Johnny's soft voice for a little, but after he read a paragraph I was bored out of my mind. Johnny stopped reading as he saw the heart monitor looking... different than usual.

"Uh, guys?" He stares at us, with his eyes widened.
I glance over at Molly.
"Molly, you okay?" I question as I run over to her bed.

I could feel my knees shaking. I could only pray that she was only asleep, and not dead.
"This isn't happening, this isn't happening, this isn't happening." I think to myself. I feel her pulse.

Her breathing was slow, but at least it was something. Johnny hops off the bed, and Darry bolts out of the room, in search for a doctor.

I held onto Molly's hand, real tight. Her breathing was begging slower and slower by the minute.
"Hey, we need a doctor in here!" Two-Bit shouts into the hallway.
"Jesus Christ!" Steve yells, obviously shaken.

This hospital was garbage. The doctor wasn't anywhere to be found, while a patient of his is dying?!? If my baby sister were to... die... it'd be all his fault.

Molly was barley breathing at this point, and just then, Darry runs back  in with the doctor.
The doctor puts an oxygen mask over her face, and feels her pulse.
"It's about time y'all came in here." Johnny mumbles.

The doctor ignores Johnny's comment.
"She most likely had a stress-related heart attack. We see 'em all the time here."

I couldn't bare to look at Molly with an oxygen mask over her face. She's been through so much, for something that could have been prevented by me. I put my hand on Johnny's shoulder, and just then, I heard a beep.

The kind of beep that you hear in one of those doctor shows. I looked at Molly's heart monitor.

It was a flatline.

It felt as if my heart sunk. My little sister's heart just stopped beating.

"You guys should get out." The doctor tells us.

I hold onto Molly's hand tighter.
"C'mon, baby, c'mon!"
I felt the tears welling up in my eyes. I couldn't loose her. Not now.

"Soda." Darry pulls on my arm. He too had tears in his eyes.
"No!" I shouted back at him.
Tears were flowing down my face, and the doctor was shooing the rest of the gang out the door.
"Soda, please." Darry sighs.
A tear falls from his left eye.
"I can't leave her! Don't you remember what happened the last time I left her!?" I sobbed.
He drags me out the hospital door, and the doctor slams it behind us.

"What the hell is the matter with you!" I shout at Darry as we make our way to the waiting room. He looks down at his feet.

Steve's face was gloomy.
"It's gonna be okay, buddy." He reassured. "It's gonna be okay."

This can't be how it all ends. Pony and Dally didn't even get to say goodbye. I didn't even get to say goodbye.

I sit down on the waiting room chair. I rest my face in the palms of my hands, and sob.

Molly was gone. It didn't even seem real. I didn't want to believe it. I'll never forgive myself for letting her walk home alone that night. There were only two things I wanted to do in the whole world; hold Molly in my arms, one last time, and get revenge on Bob.

We couldn't even call the cops, because court would split us up, but I had some things in mind that were worse than jail. Worse than hell.

I sat and cried on Steve's shoulder for what felt like hours upon hours. I didn't want to move. I felt numb, but I was still hurting so badly. I didn't know what to do with myself anymore. I felt like I was the one who killed her.

It should have been me lying helplessly on a cold, hard, hospital bed. It just wasn't fair.

Nothing was ever fair.