Letter to My Former Self ||Bakushima||

//6// Your Smile Is My Favourite Colour

      I'm overthinking this. It's only been half an hour. God, where is he? I should call him... just to make sure.
      I click to call, and before it can even finish the first ring, the door slowly begins to creak open.
      "You're awake!"
      I open my mouth to speak but the sound of Bakugou's now ringing phone cuts me off. He takes it out of his pocket then shows me the caller. "Nice timing." He says sarcastically.
      "Sorry, I just got a little worried," I respond with a laugh.
      "Worried?" He questions, walking towards the bed. "I"m the one who should be worried about you." He sits on the edge of the bed. I sit up, allowing him to come closer. "Are you okay? You just sort of blacked out."
      "Yeah, just like you told the hospital, I was under a lot of stress."
      "Yeah, and I can see why. I'm sorry today's been tough. I wish there was more I could do to help." He looks down at his feet with a dismal expression. I could name all the endless ways he's helped me starting with the night he came to pick me up leading to right now. However, I don't think I have the energy to talk that much yet, so, I'll do the next best thing.
      "Hey, Bakugou?"
      "Yeah?" He starts to raise his head, but before he's even being able to do so, I wrap my arms around him and nuzzle my head into the crook of his neck.
      "Huh? Hey, what are you doing?!"
      "Thanking you!"
      "For what?"
      "Everything! For the night you decided to pick me up when I got lost, for the night you let me fall asleep in your arms after I had a bad dream, and lastly, for today for coming with me to talk to Sabi- or... my mom and comforting me when I broke down." I pull away a little, just enough to meet his eyes. "Even right now. You just being here is a reason to thank you." I laugh as I speak. Bakugou is trying to hold in a smile, but failing miserably. I can tell he's forcing the corners of his lips down.

Bakugou Katsuki

      I love him. I love him so much more than I thought I did that night when he fell asleep in my arms so I carried him to bed and slept next to him, listening to the sound of his breathing as I wrapped my arms around him and he buried his head into my chest letting out silent snores. His hair would often tickle my chin and I was so... so tempted to kiss his forehead yet restrained myself because I knew in the morning I would've felt guilty. I want to tell him, and right now while he's smiling like this, it would all just be so perfect. For me at least. I'm not going to do it. Not now. He needs time to get better and take in everything that's happened today. Me confessing would just be adding extra garbage to the pile, especially if he doesn't feel the same. But someday. Even if that day is years from now when we've already graduated and he's found someone else to love. I'll tell him when it's right.
      "You're wearing my jacket," I point out in an attempt to ignore my wandering thoughts.
      "Oh, yeah. Sorry, you just left it here and I figured why not?" He chuckles and scratches the back of his head nervously.
      I make a "hmph" sound with my nose. "Same one I lent you that night. It looks good on you."
      "You think so?" He says with a radiant smile. "Heh, thanks."
      "Yeah, yeah, don't mention it." I roll my eyes. "We should get back to the dorms."
      He nods in agreement. "Yeah, you're right."
      "But, sorry I just have one question." He tilts his head.
      "What is it?"
      "What are you gonna do now? You know, about your mom and all."
      "I haven't really thought about it, but I kinda want to see her again, just one last time. There are a few things I want to talk to her about. But after that, I don't plan on seeing her again." He averts his eyes. "Do you think that's a little drastic? I mean, cutting her out completely? I know she's a bad person but she's my mom nonetheless."
      "If you think it'll make you happier then no, it's not drastic at all." He meets my eyes again, but this time his smile has dissolved. "As long as you're focusing on making yourself happy, I really can't be mad at what you decide to do."
      "You know, you're a lot nicer than what people give you credit for."
      "You think so?" I look at him with a look of disagreement.
      "No, I know so. I mean, I doubt someone like Kaminari could ever imagine you helping someone with problems like mine. And I mean, this is just an assumption, but it kinda makes me feel like you've done it before."
      I go quiet. A picture of Shion appears in my head but I blemish out her face and focus on Kirishima's. "I'm flattered you think I make a good therapist." I ignore his question. He just laughs.
      "Who needs a therapist when you have a Bakugou!" His smile could melt steel. I didn't even notice I was grinning until he pointed it out. "Wow, where'd you learn to do that?"
      "Do what?" He put his two index fingers on the corners of my lips. I was confused at first but for whatever reason didn't say anything.
      "Awe, you're smiling!"
      "...And?" I move my head away from his hands.
      "Well, you don't smile often. You usually only smile when you're winning a fight against someone." He lets out a chuckle. Normally I'd oppose to a comment like that but right now I can't cause he's actually right. I really do only smile when it's for my benefit. Though for whatever reason right now is different. I don't give a shit that I'm smiling, smiling around him just feels natural so why bother trying to keep my scowl.
      "Whatever," Is all I say.
      "You should smile more. You look so charming when you do."
      "Charming's not exactly the look I'm going for." He rolls his eyes.
      "Whatever," He says trying to mimic my voice. I flip him off and he giggles. "Anyways, you have a beautiful smile. End of discussion."
      "Someone with a smile like yours shouldn't be complimenting a crooked smile like mine."
      "Shut up, the crooked part just makes it cuter."
      "You're full of shit. Anyways, let's get back to the dorms." I start to stand up, causing Kirishima to release me from his grasp.
      "You know I'm not gonna quit until you admit you have an attractive smile, right?"
      "You know I'm not gonna quit until you admit yours is significantly more adorable, right?" He laughs again before getting up with me.
      "Can't wait to see who wins this battle."
      "You're wasting your time. I always win."
      "Oh, we'll see about that." He elbows my arm and smiles playfully.
      I really, truly love him. Dammit.