Same, but Different

•Chapter XII•

"I won't."

I closed my eyes and brought my lips to Matthew's once more, the brunet accepting me this time and moving his lips against mine. He nibbled lightly on my bottom lip and I let him in, my hands latching onto his neck in partial desperation.

His hands trailed down to the hem of my shirt, tugging it off after checking once more than I wanted this. I unbuttoned his, pulling it off his shoulders before resting my head against his bare chest.

I laughed softly. "You're hard."

"Shut up," he replied, his face flushed. His lips came back to mine briefly. "You are too."

"Shh," I hushed him. "Less talking, more kissing."

He chuckled lightly, his mouth finding mine once more. It was soft and gentle with burning passion in each touch, our hands roaming the other's body at every chance we had. It was perfect.

Levi's eyes darkened as I crawled into his lap, his hands undoing the countless straps to our uniform. He brought his lips to mine slowly, sensually as I grinded against him.

"Fuck, I love you—"

"Eren?"

I wrapped my legs around Matthew's waist. "I was just thinking that the sofa may not be the best place to do this."

Matthew laughed, standing up and walking with me attached to him. Our lips connected as we fell onto the bed, me giggling happily.

We got back into our original mood, Matthew's fingers staying gingerly around the waistband of my boxers after he rid me of my jeans.

"Can I...?"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, Captain, I'm sure."

"Do you promise?"

I nodded bashfully, pushing the memories away. "Yes, please."

Matthew smiled, pulling off my boxers and grabbing a bottle from inside one of his drawers. I felt a finger slip into me and squirmed a little from the unusual feeling. I hadn't done anything since meeting Matthew.

"It'll only be for a little while," he assured. "I promise, it'll feel good soon."

I nodded quickly. "It's fine."

We kissed once again as he prepared me, the brunet making sure I was okay every step of the way as I moaned into his mouth. Being with him made me happy. I felt content.

I felt his fingers leave me and whined, only to have something bigger placed at my entrance. "Do it." I urged, and the brunet pushed in.

"I love you, Eren." He whispered into my ear.

"Eren, our world is hell, but with you, it's not as unbearable. You've given not just humanity, but me hope and I love you for that. I love you."

A tear fell from my cheek as I remembered Levi's past words, and despite how I tried to hide it, once another fell I began to sob.

Matthew stopped, trying to pull out.

I shook my head, wiping the tears away. "Don't, it's okay."

He pulled out completely, his hands going to his head. "I'm so sorry, Eren."

"It was my choice!"

"I shouldn't have done this. You weren't ready. I'm sorry."

"Matthew..."

"It's Levi, right?"

I furrowed my eyebrows. "What about Levi?"

"You love him."