Melt Away - A Deadpool Fanfiction

Off-Day Training

"See?" I had a feeling that Nick Fuckface was going to explode right then and there, but he sighed instead. Contained for the time being. Mostly to avoid Alix's wrath.

"Alright. Fine. But if you cause trouble, I'd be setting you on fire." He threatened, and I shrug.

"I'd get Alix to put me out. You'd do that right?"

"Yep. Now hurry up or else the Blackbird would take off without us and leave us to fly off after them. To make things worse, I'm the only one who can fly and I can't carry you." Alix called, as I made a salute sign to Pirate Angry as we ran off. And of course, nobody was thrilled to see me.

"What are you doing here? I thought today was your day off." Logan was literally about to stab me with those claws. Cripes. I looked around before answering. Storm operating the system, Kitty chatting with Alix, Mr Teleporter Man - also known as Nightcrawler, alias for Spiders - was helping Storm with the controls. Then I turned back to Logan.

"It is my day off. But Alix asked me to turn up, and I decided that I would just to see how many times she messes up for material to make fun of her for." I answered truthfully, and the claws retract.

"You're a terrible liar Wade, but I'd take your word for it. Oh and for your Info, Alix hadn't messed up yet, so you'd be disappointed." He said in a neutral tone. I shrugged, putting both hands up. But Alix suddenly appeared next to us, making both Wolfie and I jump a little. What is she a Ninja?

"Okay, one, I only missed eight shots, okay Wade? Two, you're here to make sure I do things right, not kiss ass, Logan." She addressed us separately, before walking off like that. Logan looked ay me strangely.

"Why did her tone change when she was talking to you? It sounded way nicer."

"Beats me. I have no idea." I lied again. Logan just frowned at me and walked off.

I KISSED HER.

God, I hate lying. And then again they come out so easily I sometimes forget that I'm lying. Or if I'm telling the truth, for that matter. Not that it really mattered. At least not to them. Alix had settled down on air again, for a second I wonder if I should risk sitting next to her.

You sure wonder a lot of things.

I guess I do. Always uncertain. Always unsure. Always indecisive. Probably why I'm crazy and probably why I just kill everything, also probably why even I don't actually know what I'm doing. Hey wait a second, I thought the voices had gone away.

Lol nope.

Great. Well, now I decided it wouldn't be risky to just sit next to her, except she was sitting on air like one of those meditation masters who somehow manage to float. Except she wasn't meditating, she was on her phone. Nick Fuckface just gave it to her.

Why are you calling him that? Fuckface?

I dunno. He's a prick. So I throw nicknames at him. Pun intended. In any case at all I peek over Alix's shoulder, hoping that she's doing something decent on her phone. She was looking up on weapons. I have a reason to fear my life now.

I mean, I didn't know that hammers with spikes on all sides existed. It looks like a crusher. If I got hit by that I doubt that even my healing factor could heal me in time to survive. Ouch.

"Why are you looking up this kind of gory stuff?" I asked, and she laughed.

"I'm okay with a gun, I suck with katanas, what do you think I should go with?"

"A bayonet." I reply honestly, and she hits me in the stomach playfully. I wonder how well she is in using weapons though. If I ask to train her will I be set on fire? Yeah. Probably. Her dad would probably destroy me.