Aangan scribbles (Finished)

Realisation

Scene -Just a take on episode 12 – everything is same until Jameel's father goes to hit chammi

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Jameel's pov:

Chammi was being her annoying self already, determined to take all the luggage upstairs herself for her so called bajiya. I didn't think they would get along with each other given that the fact they haven't met before and there is a total difference education wise or even personality wise. As I was heading upstairs, I heard Shakeel and Chammi arguing as usual and getting angry I moved towards the room but stopped in my tracks. I heard Shakeel tell Aliya about Chammi lying about her clothes and that she didn't really own any clothes herself, everything was her Amma's.I hid behind the curtain as Shakeel walked out wanting to listen what Chammi would tell Aliya.

Aliya told her not to mind Shakeel and that she could tell anything to her without any judgments, but Chammi said thank you in the softest voice and said she's fine. There was this uneasiness and guilt growing inside me again which I didn't want. Did I really know chammi at all and was I being too harsh on her?

The next day again I could hear Chammi and Shakeel fighting but this time Aliya told Chammi not to tell Shakeel off. I saw the hurt cross over her face when Shakeel hugged her Aliya, which was quickly masked off in an angry glare. I then decided to talk to Chammi tonight as no matter what problems or misunderstandings we have I still cared for her.

It was evening now the sky was getting darker and everyone would be going to their rooms so it would be the perfect opportunity to talk to her. I looked around the house but couldn't find her when I heard Amma congratulating daadi on getting another grandson and I instantly knew where Chammi would be, so without wasting any time I almost ran towards the terrace. As I got up, I saw Aliya sitting with Chammi already. I don't know why I felt jealous of Aliya, I felt betrayed when Chammi would talk so sweetly with her the same way she did with me or the way she would laugh carefree in front of her and I thought that smile of Chammi that came from within was just for me. I was just about to go when I heard Aliya congratulate Chammi on the birth of her new step brother and I almost face palmed on how blind can Aliya be, so I waited to see if Chammi would blast on Aliya with anger. I was actually surprised when there was a long sigh on Chammi's end. She wasn't shouting but she still had this raw anger in her voice when she took her Abba's name.

Then the conversation that follow. God I wasn't ready for it. The answer that Chammi gave to Aliya's simple question about telling her how she felt, and that she is here to listen.

"I'll tell you everything, but you only have to listen okay? Do you know bajiya Shakeel was right I don't have clothes that I can say are mine or any that have not been repaired. Yes, obviously one of the reasons is money. You know my Abba sends my money every month in form of his love, every time I get that money, I feel almost sick but at the same time tell myself I deserve it but I still can't get myself to use it so I always saved it. Everyone is always asking me about where I spent my money and I'll tell you today. Daadi's medicine is quite expensive and I heard chacha once telling chachi that they can't afford Shakeel to go to school but I didn't want him to be a gawar like me for the rest of his life because trust me you'll always be taunted for this no matter what anyone say .Since then whenever Bari chachi would ask me to get medicines for daadi I'll use my own money . I think if anyone I can connect most with in the house is Israr chachu , both of us are these unwanted things that no one can rid off and no one really would be effected if they are gone so , when Chacha would be gone for a few days I'll buy him some food or books that he likes to read and both of us will sit in his room for ours. The rest of the money I can't really tell you, but I invested it in an important person who I wanted to gain everything they wanted in their life and who I truly thought cared for me, but the reality is people like me and Israr chachu aren't made to be loved. I didn't tell anyone as I didn't want them think they are in debt or something and I did this because I love them with all my heart .