The Marauders: Moony

Remus and the Patronus

"Remus?" 

Remus looked up into Freya's dark eyes. She had put her book about defensive spells down on the table and was looking across at him with a curious glisten in her eye.

"Yes, Freya?" He replied, putting his own book down on the table.

"Have you ever tried to cast a patronus?" She asked.

The memories filled Remus's mind.

***

"Right boys!... And girls. We've been chosen for this honour, and if we're going to call ourselves members of the order, we need to live up to that title! And what better way, than being able to cast a patronus?" James's voice filled the room, being amplified by the sonorous spell which he had cast.

Remus looked around as every pair of eyes was focused on James. He really was a natural leader. Everyone was captivated by his words, his presence.

"We don't all know how to cast a patronus." Marlene shouted from the back of the room.

"That's why we've gathered here today. To learn. So now I shall hand you over to the brightest wizard in our year, Mr Remus Lupin!"  James said, gesturing towards Remus, who walked to the front of the small crowd.

Remus took a deep breath, his eyes scanning the crowd.

"Right guys. I'm no expert, but I've studied this book and I believe that within a few weeks, we should all be able to cast a patronus if we really stick with it." Remus said, running his fingers along the broken spine of his book.

Remus looked up. Everyone was focused on him. He was not nervous. Remus was fine with crowds, with people, especially when he was able to give them some knowledge, to teach them something new, which may help them in the future, possibly even save their lives.

"So the first step is to think of the best memory you have, and allow it to completely fill your mind..."

***

"Padfoot! How can I teach these people when I can't even do it myself! I've been trying for weeks, but I just can't do it!" Remus yelled in frustration, pulling at his hair and throwing himself down onto the end of his bed.

Sirius sat calmly opposite, on his own bed, watching Remus, his chin resting in his palm as he studied him closely.

"Remus, don't worry, they won't think any less of you." Sirius tried to soothe him.

"I'm a fraud padfoot!" Remus yelled, getting up and pacing around the room with his wand in his hand, before throwing it on the floor in frustration.

"Maybe the memory you've chosen isn't strong enough. Try another one." Sirius suggested, getting up and patting Remus on the back. 

Sirius picked up Remus's wand from the floor and put it in his hand. He kept his hand around Remus's and stood by his side.

"Do you remember when you first told us about your furry little problem?" Sirius asked.

"Yes. I was so scared, so worried that you'd all hate me." Remus laughed, calming down a little.

"But do you remember the relief afterwards. We love you, Remus, we accept you in every single way." Sirius spoke gently, further calming Remus.

Sirius lifted Remus's hand until it was out in front of him.

"Think of that feeling. Let it consume you. Expecto patronum." Sirius coaxed.

Remus took a deep breath and let the memories flood his mind.

He felt tears begin to spring to his eyes, and quickly closed them, not wanting Sirius to see him like this.

Remus took another deep breath and stood up straight.

"Expecto patronum!" He let the words escape along with the memories, the feelings, and when he opened his eyes, a majestic wolf was bounding around the room.

"A wolf? A fucking wolf!" Remus shouted.

He felt so happy that he had cast his first patronus, but so angry that it had to be a wolf.

Sirius was sitting on the floor laughing. He found the whole situation rather comical.

Remus dropped to the floor in front of him.

"A fucking wolf?!" He exclaimed again.

***

"Yes... I have." He responded.

"What was it?" She asked, her dark orbs fixed on his.

He didn't want to lie, he really didn't. And he couldn't.

"It was a wolf." He smiled, looking away from her.

"Have you ever done it?" He asked her, changing the subject before she could ask about the wolf.

"I've tried... But never succeeded." She replied. This time it was her turn to look away.

Remus nodded, and was about to return to his book when he heard a small voice.

"Maybe you could help me some time?" She asked.

Remus looked back at her. She seemed almost nervous.

"Of course. Chocolate?" He asked, holding the bar out to her.

She broke a piece off and popped it into her mouth, closing her eyes and smiling.

"Thank you Remus."