Hwarang: Angel In Disguise

Episode 9

TW: panic attack

I wake up to a throbbing headache, my vision slightly blurred. It was awful, the left side of my face feeling like it was melting off. It was a migraine and it was so bad, I wanted to cry.

I pull Han Sung off of me, his cute little whines amplified to sound more like screaming inside my head. Gently moving his body, I tuck him in to bed before running to my office.

I barely make it in, my feet tripping over nothing as I land on the bed, my shaking hand grabbing my acupuncture needles. Locating the proper pressure points, I lower the needle into my skin, sighing as it temporarily relieves my headache.

Somewhat able to walk now, I drink some herbal tea, gladly welcoming the warmth it brings to my body. My eyelids droop as I take the needles out and I lean against the wall, letting darkness overtake me.

"Y/N~...Y/N~ it's me! Jin Heung!"

I open my eyes to see a blurry face. I couldn't make out the features but the voice was just as I remember it.

"I have to go now. I don't think I'll ever see you again." He says. I jump up, grabbing his hand.

"Don't leave me. You're my best friend. We grew up together." I say.

"I have to go. I'll miss you Y/N."

"Wait, Jin Heung? Where are you going?"

"Somewhere far away. Stay safe for me."

"Wait! Take me with you. I have no family anymore. You're all I have left. Don't leave me like this. You can't leave me alone!" I plead. He rips his hand out of mine, not looking at me.

"Goodbye Y/N."

"Jin Heung!"

I wake up with a start, looking around to see myself back in Hwarang house. I sit back, still panting from my dream. My chest feels compressed, my breaths labored as if I had just run a mile. A tear rolls down my face, followed by another, and another.

"I miss you Jin Heung. Why did you leave me.." I whisper, staring at my bracelet. Then it hits me.

Ji Dwi.

Is he the king? He has to be. There's nobody else. His fighting technique, his voice, even his age matches up. Is he Jin Heung? Is he the one who left me all alone in this cruel world? It can't be....but his relationship with the Queen..there's no other explanation.

I rub my eyes, trying to wipe away my tears but they kept going, flooding my face. My hands shake, my feet tingling as the room seems warped, my eyes playing tricks on my brain.

He can't be Jin Heung, but at the same time, he has to be. I'm overthinking this again.

I look around, the decorations from Ji Dwi only setting me off further into a hole of spiraling thoughts. Desperate to find peace from myself, I pick myself up, wanting to head back to my dorm. I ignore the stares of Hwarangs, burying my face in my hands as I walk by. Footsteps thump from behind me, growing in volume until Ji Dwi jumps infront of me, trying to scare me.

I look at him, studying his face before a wave a new tears rises from my eyes.

I don't want you to be Jin Heung, but I want it at the same time.

He looks at me, watching me cry before he holds out a bag of silver, telling me to take it.

"You like it don't you? Take it and stop crying." He says. I ignore him and keep walking, ignoring the hot spell running down my spine.