chapter 1- Intensive Care

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*4th January 2010*

It was a quiet but awkward night in tonight at dinner. Me and Liam were sat at the corner of the ever so warn table, whereas Mum and Dad were sat opposite us. I could feel Mum glaring at me. I knew she wanted me again. The usual. There was nothing I could do that would stop her once she started. She always decided to take her anger out on me and when there was nothing left to give...she pushed on with what she has started no matter what consequence it had for me. 

The odd thing tonight though was that Liam and Dad were not speaking to each other. Normally they would be the only ones to speak during dinner.

"Liam, Lilly I'm going out tonight for an important thing, your mum will be looking after you both."

What? Dad is...going out and...leaving mum...with me..alone? Yes Liam would be here but as usual he'd probably be working with his headphones on, completely oblivious to his surroundings.

"*cough* Dad...but can I go to Danielle's house? She wanted me to help her with the homework we recently got set. Please?" Liam begged him as usual. I did like my brother, he was academic and never seemed to bother me much. 

"Of course son just don't be any later than 10pm right? You'll need the sleep."

Liam nodded before picking up his knife and fork again to eat the mush presented on his plate. After an hour it was time for Dad to leave, we said our goodbyes before re-entering the house. I edged away, hoping to make a quick exit but Liam stopped me before I could put my getaway plan into action.

"I'm going out now Lilly tell mum would you for me? I'll be back later."

"I supp-"

"THANK YOU!" Okay, maybe I was wrong, he did annoy me.

Now for tonight. This time I ran straight to my bedroom and locked the door before hiding under the bed, wishfully hoping it wouldn't happen.

"LILLY MAY PAYNE YOU'RE A DISGRACE! OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW BEFORE I SMASH IT DOWN!"

"No" I thought to myself. I was too scared to even breath never mind let a word leave my mouth. Seems like that wishful hoping has gone down the drain. 

"DON'T YOU DARE IGNORE ME I WILL KILL YOU!"

I know you will that's why I'm hiding come on get your brain into gear... seriously?

"FINE THEN HAVE IT THE HARD WAY I'M COMING IN!"

The tears started rolling down my cheeks as I heard the door pounding open. I stood up and tried running for the window. I was ready to jump no matter what, nothing mattered right now I needed to escape. Now!

"THIS TIME I WILL NOT HESITATE"

"LEAVE ME ALONE OR I'M GONNA JUMP!" I couldn't take it any longer. So much pain.

"YOU WOULDN'T DARE.."

"DON'T DARE ME!!" I had jumped, I'm sure of it but I never hit anything it felt like I was fl-

"I TOLD YOU!"

I looked down to see the floor, my mum had easily grabbed me and stopped me from falling, but why? She wanted me dead, why couldn't I just make it easier for her?

"I LIKE TO SEE YOU SUFFER NOT GIVE IN,"

"NOO GET OFF ME NOW GET OFF GET OFF" I repeated trying to attract the neighbours but no one answered, I was alone...again.

"Hahaaa you make me laugh, you're pathetic Lilly. I'm too ashamed to call you my daughter." She spat.

"And I'm ashamed to call you my mother.." I said a little too aloud but still hoping she wouldn't hear me. Yet again, my hope failed me.

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