Through Time and Space: A Love Story

Chapter Eight: Redemption

   Ash spent the next two months preparing for her chance at forgiveness. She had the perfect plan in place. She was gonna take Maeve back to where they first met: the rose garden of Jaguar Falls. Her first bit of help came from Lian and Chef Xavier. Most of her free time had been dedicated to learning how to cook. If she was going to impress Maeve, she wanted it to be over a romantic dinner. She knew everything Maeve liked to eat, so she focused on creating the perfect menu.
   Whatever time wasn't spent in the kitchen, she spent with Lian learning how to be romantic. If Ash thought that cooking was a foreign concept, romance was practically alien to her. She never knew much about it because most of her life was spent learning to be the best soldier possible. And the only relationship she had ever been in was more casual than it was serious or intimate.
   But this was going to be anything other than casual. Ash saw potential in Maeve, and wanted Maeve to see the same in her. During her time spent learning from Lian, she tended to stumble a lot more than she did in the kitchen. The biggest challenge was overcoming her bad habits and replacing them with proper manners. Doing so was no easy task during the first two weeks, but over time, the pieces started falling in place for her.
   And when she wasn't learning from Lian or Chef Xavier, she was taking advice from Inara to learn how to garden. Ash was thankful for Brightmarsh being tropical year-round, so it made growing plants much easier.  She also got help from Skye and Lian regarding fashion. They both taught her how to pick matching outfits that suited every possible date. Tyra would step in from time to time and offer help with cosmetics. It was strange to think that she knew anything about that, but Ash was grateful nonetheless. Her busy schedule made her life a little chaotic, but she had to push through if she was gonna win Maeve back.
   Having learned everything she needed to, she decided to spend her last few days of free time out fishing with Dredge, Makoa, and Barik. The four of them were out at sea beyond Serpent Beach, enjoying the warm ocean breeze on their boat. Most of their time was spent in silence, so Barik decided to make conversation.
   "Ya know, lassie, I think it's a good thing yer doing for your special lady," he said. "It's also really nice to be out of the forge for a change and just relax at sea."
   "Aye, couldn't agree more," Dredge concurred. "I haven't had time to enjoy fishing in many years."
   "Well, I figured it wouldn't hurt to try something new," Ash said. "Maeve loves fish and I just want the pride of being able to tell her all about my first catch."
   "You have the right idea, lassie," Barik said, placing a hand on her shoulder. "But if ya ask me, I don't think she would be too worried about that. It's the thought that counts. Especially since Valentine's Day is coming up."
   "Yeah, yeah, I get it," Ash groaned. "I don't know why I feel like I have to do this. I just do."
   "It's your pride getting the best of you," Makoa said. He had been silent this whole time...until now. "Your guilt leads you to believe that your sins can only be forgiven if you take your good deeds to the extreme. I think you're doing this more for the sake of forgiving yourself than you are to seek her favor." The truth in the Ancient One's words hurt. She was trying to forgive herself. Ash had been putting on a brave face ever since the incident. She wanted to appear confident and resolved in front of the others. But when she was behind closed doors, she would cry for hours. Some days, she would purposely starve herself as punishment. Or when she was in her room, she'd write insults on her arm to remind herself what an idiot she was. She couldn't bring herself to cut her wrists the way Maeve had because she didn't want her to worry, but that didn't mean she wasn't gonna find other ways to hurt herself.
   Most nights had also been spent in total agony. She struggled to sleep most of the time. And whatever sleep she did manage to get was plagued with nightmares. Ash was falling apart faster than she could fix herself, so she had to give it everything she got to redeem herself. It felt like the only possible solution.
   "Yeah... you're right," Ash admitted. "It feels like the only way I can ever be forgiven, so I have to try every possible idea."
   "That isn't the right way to look at things. Forgiveness isn't about making things right; it's about knowing you were wrong and coming to terms with it. It's about moving on from the past in hopes of a better future. The mistakes we make serve as examples to teach us what not to do. If you keep making the same mistakes, you can never learn to forgive yourself," he said.
   "Sometimes, it's difficult to know what's right and what isn't. Everyone has different ideas on right and wrong, so it feels like walking on eggshells every time I make a decision," Ash said.
   "That is correct. Because everyone has such contradictory views on right and wrong, there is no such thing as either of them. Everyone will always have different beliefs and conflicting views on life. The only way to truly find out what's wrong and what's right is to consider the good things and the bad on every decision you make. If you believe that what you think or know is right but it could hurt someone else, then it isn't right. You have to consider all options to find what benefits everyone so nobody gets hurt," Makoa explained.
   "What is with everyone being so wise?" Ash asked. Makoa and the others laughed at her question.
   "When you've lived a long time, you learn many things," Makoa replied. Suddenly, Ash's fishing rod started jerking erratically.
   "Holy shit, I got one!" she exclaimed, tugging on her pole. The others jumped up to look over the side of the boat.
   "It's a big one, too," Makoa pointed out. "Let me handle this one." Ash handed him her fishing rod and in one swift, powerful yank, he pulled the fish out of the water. The thing was massive, at least 10 feet long. It soared high above the boat. The four of them prepared to catch it. When it landed in their arms, they all dropped a little.
   "Fuck, this thing is heavy! It must with at least 30 pounds!" Ash said.
   "Fifty pounds would be a more accurate estimate," Makoa commented.
   "Let's get this beauty back to shore!" Barik said excitedly. Satisfied with their colossal catch, they sailed back onto land. They carried the fish back to Makoa's laboratory and heaved it into the massive fish tank he had in it.
   "Shit, Makoa, do you prepare for these kinds of things?" Ash asked panting.
   "As a matter of fact, I do," he said, turning to one of his tables. He flipped open a book and browsed through the images in it. When he found what he was looking for, he pointed to it. "Looks like you caught yourself a blue fin halibut. They can grow to be 15-20 feet in length and weigh as much as 70 pounds."
   "Well, I guess it's certainly a halibut catch," Ash said giggling. The other three just glared at her. "Oh, fuck you guys. That was a good one."
   "Anyways," Makoa said turning back to his book. "It seems here you caught a decent catch. I estimate it to be about 13 feet."
   "Just as long as Maeve likes it," Ash said. "Thanks for your help, guys."
   "No problem," they all said. Ash waved goodbye and headed out. Everything was finally in place for the perfect date with Maeve. Now it was just a matter of getting her to Jaguar Falls in three days. She grabbed her phone from her pocket to text Maeve. "Wanna meet up Wednesday? I wanna show you something cool." Ash made her way back to Crosswind Hold, where she would get ready for the date. Her phone finally went off. "Sure thing. Heard you went out fishing today. Can't wait to see what you caught. 😋"
   Classic Maeve. Her response made Ash giggle. There were two things Maeve loved most in life: fish, and milk. Any time either of those things were mentioned, her face would light up in the most adorable way. Ash found it endearing. It was one of the little things she loved about Maeve. She was ready for this date. Ash was excited about her chance to win Maeve back.