In Too Deep

Chapter 17

I grabbed a handful of cushions and placed them under my head, my feet on Jess's lap. "Have you seen the Instagram post?" I asked, not sure if I wanted to hear the answer.

Jess paused and then nodded. "So what do you think? Will anyone recognise me?" Of course what I really wanted to ask was: Would Jared know it was me?

She rubbed her hands over my feet, knowing it was a guaranteed stress reliever. "Do you want the honest truth?" I could feel the air around me cooling, reaching out and curling its way into my veins.

"Just tell me what you think Jess ... honestly."

"Well ... I know it's you because I know you're with Shannon some of the time," she said, reassuring me slightly. "Whether anyone else will know .... well ... I guess time will tell," she mused. But I could tell she was holding something back. I noticed little frown lines creasing her brow and that habit she had of rubbing the skin on her lips if she was worried.

I took a gulp of wine to calm my nerves. "OK what's up? I can tell there's something you're not saying. Just spit it out."

Jess breathed deeply before speaking. "Jared's called the office this afternoon and he's been calling my phone, wanting to know where you are. Have you had any missed calls or messages from him?" she asked. "He sounded really pissed .... maybe you should call him back to sort out the problem," she suggested, moving my feet from her lap and placing them back on the floor. "Come on. There's no time like the present. You know what he's like – the longer you leave it, the more pissed he'll get."

So now I've got Shannon pissed with me because I ran out on him, unable to communicate my feelings' and Jared's pissed with me for reasons unknown. I rested my elbows on my knees and groaned. "Jess, why did I ever agree to take on this job with Jared? My stress levels are way off the scale." I could feel my stomach tightening, butterflies fluttering at the thought of what was to come next.

Jess pushed herself up from the sofa and walked into the kitchen. "Is your phone in this bag on the floor Lex?" she called out. I could hear her rummaging around and then she returned, holding it out to me. "Call him, now! Find out what's the problem and then deal with it. And Lex ..." she sat back down and pulled me into her arms. "Try a bit of self restraint and honesty. It's four days until the party. What happens then, when you're confronted with Jared and Shannon? You have to sort out this shit before it's too late sweetheart." She dragged her fingers through my hair, watching as I closed my eyes. I felt her lips brush across my cheek. "Go Lex. Phone Jared."

**************

I sat on my bed, phone in hand dreading the next few minutes. After a few deep breaths, I lay back on the pillows and hit the call button next to his name.

One ring, two rings, three rings ... four rings. I was just about to hang up when the line suddenly connected. There was silence. Keep a grip Lexy, I thought, even though I could feel a sense of panic taking over me. "Ummmm ... Jared, are you there?" I asked, again met with silence. I tried to bring my breathing under control. "OK, if you're not going to talk, I'll hang up ..." I waited to see if this would work, more than willing to carry out my threat.

Suddenly his voice whispered down the line: "There's something you're not telling me Lexy. Why couldn't I get hold of you this afternoon?" There was a pause, then he continued: "I called the office as well as Jess but nobody would say where you were. What's the secret you're keeping?"

I could feel a swirling vortex in my head, my vision was clouded and every muscle tensed as I desperately fought to find a credible answer. What had Jess said about telling the truth? "Jared." I paused for a moment, giving me time to think. "Look I know you demand a lot ... but I have a life away from this job as well you know. And that life is private. Surely you of all people can understand the need to keep some things secret." I waited to see how he would react. There was silence again.

Downstairs I could hear Jess clearing the kitchen, pots and pans clattering and doors opening and closing. "Jared, are you speaking to me?" I asked. All I could hear in the background was noise and I was sure a murmured conversation. "Jared, are you with someone else? Talk to me or I'll hang up." Still nothing. I huffed and hit the end call button. Two people could play this game, I thought. I tossed my phone on to the bedside table and waited for him to call me back. Nothing. Downstairs, the kitchen din had subsided and I could hear the creak of the stairs. Jess must be coming to bed.

"Jess," I called out, "Things didn't work out. J wouldn't talk to me." I heard footsteps outside my door and the handle turned. "Come and talk to me Jess, for God's sake I need someone to hold on to at the moment." I closed my eyes and breathed. The bed dipped. "How can I deal with him Jess?" I reached out for her hand and opened my eyes.

I'd dimmed the lights so I wasn't dazzled but the sight made me freeze, the words drying up in my throat. Jared was sat on my bed, his blue eyes drilling into me. "Talk to me instead Lexy." I tried sitting up but wasn't quick enough, his hands pushing me down.

I was trapped. I tried to move, but each time I twisted away, Jared's grip tightened on my wrists. I watched as his muscles strained against my efforts to free myself. "Just-let-me-go," I gasped, the words stammered through sobs as I gave up holding back the floodgate of tears. His grip loosened and I yanked my arms away, turning my face into the pillow, wanting to hide the tears now streaming down my reddened cheeks. I was furious that Jared could cause me to break down like this. I'd never felt so vulnerable. There was movement behind me and I felt the mattress dip further, the cool air replaced by the warmth of his body. Jared's hand returned, this time gentle and soothing, gently rubbing my back and shoulders.

Jared's POV

I knew I shouldn't have come back to Lexy's but I was so mad when she left so suddenly this afternoon. I've always made a point of never mixing work with pleasure - and this is the reason why. My anger got the better of me and now look what's happened. I can't bear to see what I've done which is why I'm lying here, too close for comfort considering what I've just put her through. I scoop a strand of her hair and breath in the smell of her body. "I'm sorry," I whisper. "Lexy talk to me. I hate myself for doing this to you." I feel her breathing calm and slow down but she doesn't move or make any attempt to say anything. I lie next to her, rubbing my stubble gently on her back, letting my breath leave warm trails across her bare shoulders. I desperately want to know who she was with this afternoon but I guess I'll have to wait until she's ready to talk. My lips leave soft kisses across her skin. "I'm leaving Lexy. Get some sleep and I'll see you tomorrow."

There's so much more I want to say and so much more I want to do. I ache for her touch, for the feel of her lips on mine. I want her long legs wrapped around me; I want to drag my tongue across her soft nipples. And I want to hear her moan as we both climax together.

But instead, I lean over and kiss her gently on her cheek. "Goodnight baby girl."