WANTED! & LOVED

Training

This chapter is dedicated to BunnyLOvesRabbit for being the 100th person to fan me. Wow never thought I'd have a 100 fans thanx all of you and love you all <3 

-Cole-

Have you ever had that moment when all you feel is complete bliss? As if life suddenly had meaning, the sun shone brighter, leaves looked greener. It's like nature can feel your mood and it radiates the feelings creating an atmosphere of complete felicity. Well that's how I was feeling now and how I've been feeling for a few days now, ever since Logan told me he loved me, I can't help to feel as if life now held more meaning for me than it did before. Is this what it's like to be loved? The complete rapture and joy, the fact that i can never stop smiling especially when he's around. 

Never in my life have I heard those words directed at me, I've heard them my dad said it to my mother all the time and she to him; never had either of them say it to me. When I was younger I used to think it was just something grown-ups said to each other. That's until I went to school and I saw other parents interact with their children; the constant shouts of 'I love yous' as parents walked through the metal gates of the school and smile on their faces as the walk of waving and the child's reply of 'I love you too.' Then I started question why my parents never say it to me, my dad a;ways left me at the gates with the parting remark 'Be good son.' that was it no smile, no wave. Just the same three words every morning. 

Well I guess it was something that he actually walked me to school, was that a show of love? I don't know that was probably more on the obligatory side than loving.. My mum never walked me to school, she always sat in the kitchen drinking coffee and reading the newspaper, she barely glance up to say bye, sometimes patting me on the head if I was close enough.

I looked it up once, the meaning of the word love; an emotion of strong affection, a representation of human kindness, compassion and affection. I was curious, I would hear others say it to each other: Old couples sitting on a bench in the park I used frequent back in Britain, people at school use to say it to each other too, I would even hear dogs be the recipient of that endearing terms. Was I the only one that hadn't heard those words directed at them? Was I unlovable?

With that kind of history with love, you can imagine my shock when Logan confessed his affection for me, to be honest I was more shocked with my confession. I mean how can I love him when I don't know what it is, not having experiencing it before. I just know that it felt right, those words, when I said them there wasn't any doubts in my mind. I did love Logan, strong affection and all. 

"Cole come on pay attention." snapped Leon as he hurtled another fist at me, I barely manage to dodge it in time and that would have hurt. 

Leon came out of his fighting stance and came to stand in front of me. "Cole you have to stop being distracted focus, try and predict your opponents next moves before they make it. All of us have got certain abilities that gives an advantage, you being...different have to work harder to get the upper hand." I don't get how they expect me to fight a bunch of mythical creatures with just my bare hands. It's impossible but every time I bring it up they give me some sort of vague answer like, you'd be surprise what you can do with just your fist, I'm starting to get the feeling that they're not telling me something, something important.

"What are you not telling me Leon?" he looked a bit puzzled by the question so I elaborated. "I mean I'm human, and you guys are not, as you say, you guys have abilities that give you an advantage over who ever the hell we're going up against and what I can't help think is that if you guys need the extra advantage, then what chance do I stand? I don't see the point in all this training if I don't even have a one percent chance of succeeding. I want to know what aren't you telling me that I need to know because your vague answers won't do any more."  I was angry I didn't like being kept out of the loop, there was something that I wasn't being told and I wanted to know. It was like there was this expectation for me to do something great or extraordinary but I didn't know what it was. I've become all to familiar with this feeling, it was the constant aura that surrounded my mum when she was near me. The expectation shining in her eyes and then there's the disappointment that follows when she realises that nothing special is going to happen.