Chapter 1

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Alyx's POV

"Hey guys how is it hanging?" I say excitedly to the camera. I'm just finishing off my 10th video of my series 'revealing your secrets' when I hear my phone go off. It's a text from Jenn saying "hey I'm bored can you come over pleaseeee xx" I automatically smile at my phone cause that's just what happens everytime I think about her or talk to her.

We just have this connection that I don't have with anyone else so I respond immediately with "ofcourse babe, I'll be there in 10". I close my computer and when I'm about to take my jacket I see a picture of Jenn and me in the corner of my eye. And I can't help but stare at her beautiful face. 'Wow snap out of it Alyx, she's your best friend and besides she's straight' I tell myself and I leave to her place.

I'm suddenly nervous when I stand in front of her door which is weird considering she makes me feel so relaxed and I always feel very comfortable whenever I'm with her

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I'm suddenly nervous when I stand in front of her door which is weird considering she makes me feel so relaxed and I always feel very comfortable whenever I'm with her. I ring the bell and I can hear footsteps in the distance. "Heyyy I missed you, thank you for coming over so quickly" she says and she opens her arms for me to hug her. I instantly wrap my arms around her waist and she wraps hers around my neck. We stay like that a pretty long time only for her to squeeze me even tighter and she nuzzles her face in my neck. I let out a sigh and I close my eyes, savouring this moment. A few moment later she eventually lets me go and she smiles at me.

"How was your day?" she asks sweetly while we're walking to the couch and we sit very closely next to eachother. "I was just finishing up another video of revealing your secrets" I laugh cause I can see her face change because she's very traumatized from the time that she made one too. "I don't understand how you can keep reading these very disturbing stories" she answers. "Well don't you wanna know that there is a mom who bought her daugther sextoys. She was 10." Jenn just makes puking noices which make me laugh. "That is exactly what I mean, that is so fucked up" she reponds while turning her body even more into me so our shoulders are touching and so are our knees even though there is plenty of space on the couch.

"And how was your day thennn?" I ask aswell. "Well I woke up pretty late and I basically just ate and watched netflix. I was waiting for you to entertain me." she wiggles her eyebrows suggestively which makes me blush. "Stop it you horny bitch" I giggled which made her laugh aswell.

We spend the rest of the afternoon watching her show Foursome on youtube but I get very uncomfortable if she has to kiss someone on the show. I know that she doesn't enjoy it very much and that she has to do it in her role but I just don't like it. We sit in her bean bag, also very close. My arm is resting around her on the top of the bean bag. She is turned into my body again but this time she's resting her head on my shoulder while her legs are a bit on top of mine this time.

"Do you wanna stay for dinner?" she asks while looking up to me. Jenn's face is really close to mine thanks to our previous position and I suddenly kinda forget how to breathe properly. I've always known that Jenn is beautiful but seeing her so up close makes my heart race. 'She's your best friend, stop looking at her like that she probably thinks that you're weird' I say to myself but I can't bring myself to look away. My eyes wander off from her gorgeous blue eyes to her full pink lips and I unconsciously lick my own. "Alyx" she whispers and I suddenly snap out of it. "Yeah ofcourse I'll stay if that's okay." I say while getting up immediately and leaving her warm body.

That was way too close, I don't know why I'm acting this way. Yes I've always felt more at ease in her presence that with anyone else. I know how good she looks, I'm not blind but I also think that our personalities just match perfectly so I'm very confused at what's going on inside my head. I can't love her more than just a friend right? I'm sure that this is just because I was up till late last night so I didn't get alot of sleep.

"What do you wanna eat?" I ask Jenn and she looks as confused as I was a few seconds ago. "I don't really care actually, do you want to make dinner or order takeout?" "well since we order takeout alot I was thinking that we could go to the store and make dinner ourselves considering we barely never do that together." I suggest and she looks pleased with my answer. " Let's go then hun"

Jenn's POV

Alyx is currently driving to the store which is giving me time to think about what just happened. There is soft music playing in the background and we're just driving in a comfortable silence, Alyx is quietly humming along to 'When the party is over' from Billie Ellish.  My thoughts are all over the place, I'm thinking about the first time that we met and how we've grown towards eachother. Wejust instantly clicked and I don't think someone has ever understood me more than Alyx has, not even my mom.

We've always had a special connection and I've never really thought about it. I've never even been in a real relationship before, I either didn't feel the same way and I don't really have time for it to begin with since the only things I do is work on my channel and hang with Alyx. And I've never really thought about getting a boyfriend, like I don't really care about them as long as I get to hang with Alyx. I've never really thought about my sexuality before, I never felt the need to put a label on myself. I know that Alyx is bi but more on the gay side and I've never really cared. I actually really like it cause we can be very close together which I really like.

Ofcourse I know that she's attractive as fuck I mean have you seen her? That jawline alone is driving me crazy. But she also really cares for people, expecially me and that's what I love the most about her. She puts other people before herself. And she makes me laugh so much, I'm always happy whenever I'm with her. I've been thinking alot about what I feel towards her. I'm not sure yet what it is but I wanna find out. I'm just scared that if she doesn't feel the same way that we will ruin our friendship forever and I can't even bare that thought.

We finally arrive at the grocery store and Alyx automatically takes a cart. "Have you figured out what you wanna eat yet?" she asks. "I was thinking about pasta with some vegetables and chicken and hopefully some wine too" I say with a smile because she knows how obsessed I am with wine " that sounds great, and fine we'll get you some wine. As long as you're not too drunk that I have to carry you to bed" I respond. "I promise, but you can still carry me to bed though" I wink seductively which makes her blush again. I walk in front of her swaying my hips a bit more than usual. This is going to be a fun night.

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