Cuts Deeper Than Love

Chapter 05: So Close Yet So Far

~

By the time Luhan woke up, it was dinnertime.

"Hyung, how are you feeling?" Sehun immediately stood up from the couch.

Luhan buried his face in his hands and let out a long sigh before answering. "How is it that I feel so full of rage and anxiety, yet also empty and hollowed out inside?"

Sehun's innocent face fell. "Hyung...I'm so sorry you feel this way."

"No. Don't feel sorry for me. It's already bad enough that Ina does," Luhan groused. "Where is she anyway?"

"She's gone home," Sehun replied. "Why don't I give her a call—"

"There's no need. I'm going to go to her. Where's my jacket?" Luhan asked curtly, about to put his shoes on.

"Aren't you gonna have dinner first?" Sehun asked. "We can go to her right after. I'll drive."

"I'm not hungry," Luhan stated, but his stomach disagreed and growled loudly in protest, which made him throw his hands up in the air and give in. "What are we having for dinner?"

~

On the way, Sehun had broken the silence by telling Luhan about everything between him and Ina. "I just wanted to apologize," the younger boy added ruefully. "If I had known that you two had had something going on, I would never have made a move on her."

Luhan's facial expression remained stoic and cold. "No, you wouldn't," he agreed. "But you would still have developed feelings for her," he said icily, turning to eye Sehun in a manner that was not at all friendly. "And you would still have gotten in the way."

"I'm sorry. I really didn't know. It's my bad. I asked her out not knowing anything about what the two of you had before I met her. She didn't say yes to me and I know it's because she loves yo—"

"I told you, she doesn't," Luhan cut him off rudely. "She just pities me."

"Well, I..." Sehun faltered. "I just mean to say that it's not her fault. I was the one who put her in a difficult situation. So I understand if you're mad at me, hyung. You have every right to be. But please don't be angry with her too. I don't want her to be unhappy."

"Difficult? It wasn't difficult at all. All she had to do was turn you down and keep her distance from you. She didn't do that though. Proves she feels something for you too. Now I wonder if that would still have happened had I been around." The elder boy gritted his teeth and under the dim lighting he looked even more animalistic and ferocious.

Sehun gulped. "Err...we're almost there. Do you—"

"Yeah, I know," Luhan interrupted again, evidently annoyed. "Do I need you to tell me that?"

Sehun just decided to shut up for the rest of the drive. He kept his feelings to himself as now just seemed like a really bad time to try to have a conversation with his hyung. He could understand why Luhan was so pissed. He just wished things were not this way.

~

After numerous phone calls that had only gone straight to voicemail because Ina had had her phone switched off, just wanting some space and peace to herself, the two boys had resorted to messaging her on every social media app she used, even emailing her. But they still received no reply, so Luhan just used the spare key to her house that she had given him.

They kept calling out her name but she was nowhere to be found. Until Luhan noticed that the duffel bags in the cloak room were not where they were supposed to be. This had given him the idea that she had been packing. Frowning, he marched into her bedroom and found that her pajamas, which she would normally leave on the side of the bed when she went out, were not there. Her laptop and handbag were also not on her table where they should be.