Secret // Calum Hood

34

Elena

“Elena, oh my gosh, wake up, please wake up!” I heard some scream.  I felt a pair of arms wrap around me and pick me up.  I was about a minute away from closing my eyes for who knows how long.  I rolled my eyes around, and saw a little bit of light as they opened for a millisecond.

“What did you do?” they asked worriedly.  I couldn’t think of who it was who was with me right now, but they seemed to be really upset.  I guess it’s my fault that they are.  Everything is always my fault.

“911!  Please hurry, there’s been a suicide attempt!” they panicked into what I guessed was a phone.

I heard them say the address.  Wait, are they coming for me?  No, I don’t think that’s necessary.  I’m fine, completely fine.  This person, whoever they are, must be overreacting.  

“Elena, please stay with me.  I love you so much, please!  Just survive this, and I’ll do anything you want!” they cried.  For a split second, I remembered everything.  It’s like their voice brought me back or something.

“Calum?” I asked, not totally opening my eyes, but not keeping them closed either.

“Elena!  I’m so sorry!  Please don’t ever try this again, I’ll give you anything you want, just tell me what you want!” he exclaimed, and I felt a pair of lips on my forehead.  Before I went back to wherever I was before, I opened my eyes fully, and saw Calum’s tear stained face.

“I want to die”.

. . .

I woke up to beeps and harsh sunlight.  I don’t know what day it is.  I don’t know where I am.  I don’t know who’s with me, if anyone is.  All I know is that I can’t fight anymore.  I drew a sharp intake of breath, and my chest hurt.  I opened my eyes and saw Calum sitting next to me, with his mother.  They were holding hands, and Calum was also holding my hand.  He was asleep, but she wasn’t.  I coughed a little.

“Elena, my dear!” she exclaimed, jumping out of her seat and kneeling next to my side of the bed.  Calum moved a little, but stayed asleep.

“What happened?” I asked

“What do you remember?” she asked sweetly, her kind eyes that matched Calum’s looking up at me.

“I remember being in the guest bathroom.  I...I wanted to drown myself.  So I went to the bathtub and sat there.  But I knew that Calum would hear the shower and come in, so...I found a razor blade and I just started to cut.  I cut everywhere.  It felt...good and bad.  I remember staining my clothes and skin and the bathtub.  And then I just kind of...fell.  And passed out.”

I couldn’t bring myself to look at Mrs. Hood.  I was crying now, and so was she.  She took the hand that wasn’t occupied by Calum and squeezed it tightly.

“I know you’ve been strong for too long.  Just try and stay strong for a little longer.”