Hidden Attraction

Chapter Twenty-Three.

Chapter Twenty-Three.

            Kissing him never felt so right and loving him with everything I have completely out in the open never felt so right either. It amazed me in a sense at how quickly he could get me to change my mind. Just a half hour ago I had my mind set on ending things and here I am, completely in love with him, making out in his bedroom.

            I didn’t want it to end and the more I thought about stopping the more he could tell, therefore making him kiss me in a new spot or a new place. Being in love is an indescribable feeling and that feeling can either be a good or a bad thing. I haven’t exactly decided yet.

            “What’s wrong?” He murmured in my ear. “Please don’t tell me you changed your mind.”

            “I didn’t.” I replied. “I’m just scared, I don’t know.”

            His kisses slowed down on my neck and he let out a sigh of frustration, his body pulling away from mine so he could pay attention to what I was saying.

            “I thought we were past that. I don’t know what I can do to make you-“

        “No.” I interrupted, a small laugh escaping my lips. “I don’t mean scared for you to touch me, I just mean scared about being in love.”

        My stomach erupted into a million tiny little butterflies as soon as I even said the word, the beat of my heart picking up it’s speed. I could tell he was confused so instead of him saying something I decided to continue my pointless speech of how I felt.

        “It’s just that now that we actually said it, it’s a lot more real now. Being in love is great, yes, but now that we’re happy I’m waiting for something to mess it up. I’ve just learned that people can’t ever be happy for a long period of time. Nobody’s life, no matter what situation or background you come from goes perfectly. There’s always something waiting behind a corner to just jump out and take you completely off-guard, ruining everything you’ve spent so long building up. I don’t want what we’ve built up to be destroyed and I’m scared because losing you would be like losing everything.”

        Deafening silence was all I could hear in his room, causing me to just stare down at his comforter and focus on my fingertips. He seemed to be deep in thought for a couple of moments before he looked at me again and sent me a small smile. The same smile that made my heart want to completely burst out of my chest and beat endlessly because it was so beautiful.

        “You’ve got a lot of thoughts, you know that?”

        “Yeah well you make me have a lot of thoughts, you know that?”

        Pushing me onto my back, he scanned over my face and gently brushed my cheek with the pad of his thumb, his eyes speaking a million words I would give anything for him to say. His forehead was still slightly sweaty from practice, as well as his hair being roughed up from the helmet he had to wear. He was so perfect and he belonged to me. That’s something I will never be able to comprehend.

        “Justin you literally complete me.” I said in disbelief. “I mean that.”

        “I don’t complete you.” He spoke up after another five seconds or so. “You’ve gotta love yourself completely before you let someone else in because when you completely love yourself, that’s when you should find someone to add onto that completeness. You don’t want to have to need someone else to complete you.”