Secrets and Lies

Chapter 4 "Do You Want Some Water For That Burn?!"

"Guys, my grandm Jill wants to meet you's" I said, scratching the back of my head in embarrasment.

"Hello Boys! Its Concon's bestest granny here"

From the corner of my eyes I saw slim stifle his laugh at the sound of my nickname, glaring at him I made the universal sign that I was going to kill him later- dragging my index finger along my neck, slowly. He smirked, before flipping  me the bird.

"Hey grandma Freeman!" they all chimed in.

" I think concon here" Slim started, glancing at me, "is embarrased to introduce you to us grandma Freeman."

The whole room collapsed into laughter.

"Im not surprised dear! Trust me, he was the same when introducing girls to me! Maybe hes secretly gay" grandma Jill chortled.

"Grandma!" I warned, but it was too late.

" I mean, growing up he would always wear my heels, a right ol diva, my Concon was, strutting his stuff" she began, " or what he thought he had, mind you I preferred our dogs show."

The boys guffawed, Tom, was clapping his hand like a retarded seal. I facepalmed, there goes my street rep along with my dignity.

"Ey Connor, do you want some water for that burn!?" AJ smirked.

I flipped him the bird, ready to retort with a sassy comeback but was cut off by gran screaming down the phone.

"WHAT? IS MY BABY HURT? WHO BURNED YOU CONCON?" she frantically gushed "LISTEN BOYS, WHEN I FIND OUT WHICH ONE OF YOU BURNED CONCON, ILL RIP OFF YOUR MAN PARTS AND FEED THEM TO THE DUCKS"She seethed, cluttering could be heard in thd background.

"Im getting my whip, you hold on Connor, im coming" she breathlesly replied.

"Ooh kinky "Aaron blurted.

We all stood there stunned at grans outburst before coming to our senses and understood why she had freaked out. It was because of what AJ had said, she assumed it was real due to her lack of knowledge in the street language today. As if on cue, we fell into a fit of laughter.

"Nothing-happened grandma, im safe- I promise" I replied in between laughs. "The second half of the match is starting in a few minutes, im cutting off bye gran" shutting the phone off I stared at the boys.

" I swear shes normal" I assured "she bakes cookies and knits like every other normal grandmother"

Slim threw a  hand around my shoulder, " Yo sparks, your gran is a legend, I wanna meet her in person!" The others nodded in agreement before the doorbell rang, indicating the chicken bucket had arrived, just in time for the last 45 minutss of the match. I made myself comfortable of the sofa as kickoff started.

The game ended 2-1  at fulltime. Hell yeah Swansea won! Though im not a supporter of the team, it was satisfying to see Manchester UTD getting their arse beaten, plus I could taunt Slim. He was devastated at the loss, his mouth hanging open, still unable to accept the fact that Man U had lost. I couldnt help myself, we copied his previous actions and twereked in his face whilst belting out our remixed version of man u's theme tune;

" Shitty, shityy man united,

shitty shitty, man united

Shitty shitty  man united

flush shit like man u down the loo!"

We went dowmstairs into the basement after a few games of foosball, me and Slim vs Tom and Aaron, they won us 5-7. AJ had left after the match had ended, saying he had something important come up, yet the look on his faced showed fear and annoyance, I disregarded it as we proceeded with the game.