My Beloved Jaan (ON HOLD)

Chapter One

Khushi cried and cried, feeling bad and guilty for never understanding her mother. She had always yelled at her mother, saying how she was a terrible person and that she never cared for her, just because she didn't have any other sibling. She would yell at her for saying she didn't care about her father and now today she knew the reason to everything.

Leaning back in the chair she was sitting in, she looked at the letter again. Several nurses passed by, other people walking by as well. Khushi was at the hospital, sitting outside the ICU.

Rereading the letter again, she couldn't help but hate her Nana. ... her Nana. He had loved her so much, she never would've thought he could be a person like this. A passion of hate built in her for him. But from looking at the letter, she understood the hate her own mother had for him.

Looking at the letter even more carefully, she realized there were little wrinkles on the paper. Khushi realized that Kinjal must have been crying when writing.

Poor Amma, she thought.

The light above the door to the ICU turned off and the doctor came out. Khushi was sostuck into the note, she hadn't even realized.

"Ms. Gupta?"

Khushi looked up and stood before the doctor. "Is everything alright," Khushi asked, eager to know, worry all over her face.

"She's fine, just a minor heart attack."

Khushi sighed and relaxed, easing her shoulders.

"Just take good care of her and she'll be fine. Although I will say this Ms. Gupta, that she needs a proper amount of nutrition and she isn't getting it. Please take care of her. You may go in if you'd like" and the doctor left.

Khushi stood there for a moment and then walked into the room. The nurses were doing their work and Kinjal still hadn't come back to her senses. The nurses left, leaving Khushi behind. She pulled a chair over and held Kinjal's hands in hers, hoping for her mother to get better.

Thinking about the grief her mother had faced, she couldn't help but burst into tears. Within seconds, Kinjal woke up and saw Khushi crying.

"Khushi?"

Khushi looked up and looked at her mother. She kissed her hands and gave her mother a hug. "Amma!"

Kinjal lightly patted her arm and Khushi sat back down.

"How are you feeling Amma?"

"Alive, that's for sure," she tried to joke. "I thought I would've died today."

"Don't say things like that."

Kinjal just lightly smiled, shutting her eyes. "I'm guessing you got my letter then?"

Khushi looked at the letter in between in her hands.

Kinjal looked at it and smiled lightly. "That was meant for you to read after I died, but I guess the plans got changed."

"I'm so sorry Amma. I'm sorry for all the hard things you've faced in life and... for never understanding you," she said, going into tears.

"Ssh... it's okay sweetheart. It's not your fault-"

"I feel so rotten!"

Kinjal shook her head and brought her hand up to her daughter's head. "Khushi, look at me."

Khushi did as her mother said.

"Don't get so hard on yourself. I don't need my 18 year old daughter crying like a 5 year old."

Khushi wiped her tears away as the nurse came in with food. "Aacha? Well I don't need my 42 year old mother to act like a 4 year old that doesn't eat properly."

Kinjal just rolled her eyes. "Why bother sweetheart? I'm already halfway to my death-"

"Don't say things like that! I don't like it!"

Kinjal just lightly smiled.

"Now quickly eat this food before I get really mad."

Kinjal still smiled.

"I'm not joking. You have to eat," and Khushi began to feed her.

Once Kinjal was done, she rested back and looked at Khushi. "You're going away for college soon, huh?"

Khushi nodded. "Yeah."

"When did you grow up so much? You were this small," she gestured with her hands, "when I first held you and now... you're all grown up."

Khushi lightly smiled. "But I'm nervous Amma. I mean, it's college. That's when all the real stuff starts."

"Hmm, true. But don't worry sweety. Nothing will go wrong."

Khushi just meekly nodded.

"When does your classes start?"

"Uh, tomorrow, actually."

"Kya! Khushi-"

Kinjal tried to get up, but Khushi stopped her.

"Amma, what are you doing?!"

"Khushi, you should go home and prepare. It'll be your first day there!"

"Relax Amma. I've only got like an hour or so that day so chill. No real classes that day."

"So?!"

"So no worries!"

Kinjal rolled her eyes and looked the other way. "Khushi, tu bhi na! And you're staying on campus for the first semester?! Yet-"

"Chill Ma! Settling down starts tomorrow. I've already got some stuff in there and ready. Although I don't get the purpose in me staying in a dorm when I live a few hours away."

"For the experience. Otherwise you won't know how to take care of yourself when you get older."

"Gee, how old can you get," Khushi said sarcastically.

Kinjal frowned. "Very funny. Now go home, take some good amount of rest. You have a big day tomorrow."

Khushi sighed. "I guess. ... you'll take care of yourself, na?"

Kinjal lightly smiled. "I'll be here."

Khushi got up and hugged her mother. "I'll see you after everything's done," Khushi said when she broke away.

Kinjal simply nodded and Khushi kissed her on the cheek and left, looking back once more ather mother before leaving.