Jackass: The untold story of Viva La Me

Chapter 1

It was a brisk morning in England, Surrey. You awoke to see few suitcases containing your belongings in your now sold flat in London. Today was the day you were moving Pennsylvania at castle Bam. To start your new job as the first ever stuntgirl on the hit mtv series "jackass" and "viva la Bam" you had gotton the job through a dickhouse productions contest on tv, and from a young age you have loved the Jackass team. Your dream has been to meet them, let alone work with them! Your dreams were finally coming true.

You feel like over the years watching them on tv, they're practically your family. As Your dad was a cunt to you, and moved to Australia in your teenage years. Your mother was happy in cornwall with your stepdad, pretending she didn't even have a daughter Like you. And your two sisters had disowned you, because they did not agree with your lifestyle. You shake off the negative thought.

You turn on your mattress to find your alarm clock revealing that you have hours before you even need to think about leaving, and contemplate the few joyous childhood memories that were watching jackass or viva la Bam. Laughing quietly at the thought of Steve-o throwing up, or weeman in a silly outfit, johnny knoxvilles contagious laugh, or even Bam being as cute as ever just skateboarding...

"No! Who am I kidding? Bam liking a girl like me? Hes probably still with missy anyway. Oh but If only..." You thought to yourself. You are very pessimistic when it comes to yourself. The past guys over the years have always treated you badly. Even though, you have always been the commited one in the relationship. But You have always had a thing for Bam margera. Hes the one who influenced you to start skate boarding, even though youre not very good at it. Just knowing you will be meeting him within 24 hours sends a chill down your spine. You turn back round to your original position on the mattress, and try to salvage as much as sleep as possible. As you were probably not going to get much from now on from the Jackass crew! You fall back asleep with a smile on your face.

You wake back up with your phone roaring by your ear drum, almost shocking you. And answer it "h-hello?" You manage to choke out. It was Michael. Your gay, best and only friend. "I'm outside your house so I can take you to the airport?" He knowingly answers. "Oh Shit!! I just woke up! Hold on, Il let you in" you hang up on him, and click the buzzer to let him in. As he makes his way up the stairs to your flat, you grab a pair of black skinny jeans, purple converse shoes, your blue "viva la Bam" shirt and leather jacket. You quickly try to put them on, As you had slept in your cheetah patterned bra and sesame street boxers.

Michael enters the room, shielding his eyes as he walks through. "Youre gay, dumbass. It doesnt matter. Besides, I've seen you naked before" you laugh. "But This is different!" He squeals. "you like men! I don't like women! Oh, but I forget, youre a man aren't you Amy? So I guess this is okay" He jokingly says revealing his eyes. "Michael!" You shout, and tackle him to the floor with just jeans and a bra on. "Ewwww, breasts!" He screams. "Shhhh!, you asshole! youre going to wake my neighbours!" You hiss at him. "Wait, Fuck what is the time?!" You get up and look at your clock. It's 6.43am and your plane is supposed to leave at 8.00am. But youre taking no chances of missing the plane, And quickly put on your shirt.

You and Michael take the few suitcases out to his car, and pile them into his boot. You tell Michael to wait in the car for you, while you go back and check if youve left anything in the flat.

You enter what once was your flat, and look around in the few empty rooms you once had. You take a moment to reflect on what's going on. This is the beggining of a new life for you. A better one. You're leaving everything you once thought precious, behind. Of course you'd still keep in contact and visit Michael, but you'd leave all your family and past lovers troubles behind. You inhale your flats aroma, and leave. Locking the door for the last time.