Mirror my Heart

Finally away from you

It's going to be the last chapter. I don't want to continue this anymore. I am not good at writing betrayal, hatred or. ...

Warning for any kind of emotional trigger like suicide.
Have a good day.

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Celina's P.o.V

I am broken beyond the scope of the doom.

Not my brother too.

That's the only thing I am thinking about. I just don't see myself in anywhere in future. I am lost.

I don't want to find out any truth or anything. I just want peace. My heart is broken. My mind is all over the place. I need to tend to my wounds. Though none of them are physical.

I should write a book about my life. But I don't think I will find anything that will mirror my heart. My heart is too broken to bear anymore.

It's time for the sun to set. The end of a day and the beginning of a brand-new night. I hope star will shine high in the sky tonight. I love stargazing .

I used to do it from the rooftop of our house. It was so peaceful. Some alone time with myself.  Then he came. Nothing was mine alone anymore. He erased my mind clean and coloured it in his choice. I didn't mind. Because my heart already belonged to him.

My Antone.  Only mine.

He truly belonged to me. I knew it from the beginning. Because he always came back to me. He chose me over everything everytime.
Well, not everytime. The only time he chose something else was when he let me go.

Yes, I haven't forgotten him. I tried but now I know, I won't be able to. I can't even hate him. Though I really want to.

Then he entered . Riley.  My beautiful Riley.  Did I deserve that? Maybe.

But Celeb? ? Why? I want to hate you. I want to kill you.

Celeb, do you remember that time when I kicked you in the balls for stealing my cupcake?  Imagine what I want to do to you now.
But when I think about hurting you, I can't even imagine it.  I still love Antone. I can imagine myself poisoning him to death but I can't imagine you in a morge. I can't imagine myself doing anything to you.

I can imagine hanging Riley from a tree but I can't imagine myself harming you. You are too precious to me. I won't ever come on your way again. You have had too much of me. Now, it's time to repay some. I am going far away from you. I won't make your life miserable anymore.

It was supposed to be my story.  But then something happened and I saw without you there's nothing to tell.

Whom do I love?

No one. I was looking for someone who will mirror my heart but it seems my heart is too vulnerable to share. It's time for me to let go.

The lake is so beautiful. You can see the night sky clearly in the water. Such a beautiful night. Nice time and place to say goodbye. I even want to haunt this place. Such a bad thing that I don't know how to swim. I wish I could just swim in the lake for a few moments. I looked around me. Everything is so beautiful.  I want to stay in here and gaze upon the star like we used to do, the three of us.  Me, Antone and Celeb.  Everything was so peaceful then.  Without the worry of the world.
Yes, think of the happy things.

The water feels warm and welcoming. So gentle. The water level rose to my shoulder. The warmth feels so good. Like a mother touch.  I feel so peaceful and happy. I know everything will be alright. I wish mother was here.  Mother! I wish to hear that voice.  Please! !

My legs aren't working.  Something is sucking me in like a vaccum. I started thrashing, for the last time please someone let me see her.  I want to jump in her arms and fall asleep. I want my tween here with me. I already miss him. He accompanied me in birth,  my whole life and now I am leaving him all alone on this scary world. No one will understand him the way I do. He will be miserable.  Let me go back to him. I don't want anything else. I can stay alone all my life if he remains happy. And father. ... I am so sorry.  Please someone get me out of here. !!  I am too tired to keep up with the water. I think it's time to rest.

"..princess! " someone yelled. Who's there? 

"Celin.." is that them? At last he came. I....

......mom.. the water is like my mother. So sweet, caring. I can get used to it. I love my last home.

"Baby girl.." someone souted from afar. I don't know who. I am so tired. 'Sleep ' someone whispered in my ear. Just like my mother.

           ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡             

                          Fin.