LUNAR

He Is Inside You

After I got done with making up a ridiculous excuse they laughed and I returned his clothes after he insists I keep them. Joseph an I walked back to our room together and then he disappeared into his room so I stayed in mine. I wonder what will happen if I stayed here with him. No, he probably doesn't want that he's too busy with his family. Was his family ever close? If so they don't look like it now. They seem like they blame each other but shouldn't they blame their fathers? They should have known not to send a little girl out there. 

"Hey, you need help packing?"

I took a deep breathe if he wouldn't have come in I would have been hating them for making a stupid decision. I should be mad at the general he doses everything for a reason right?

"Are you ok?"

"Yeah."

I could tell that it was Joseph from his voice but I didn't want to look at him because I was afraid he would read through me. I felt the bed cave in and I fell back onto him. I didn't stop myself I didn't want to. My head was on his chest and he was looking down at me. I felt his heart beating faster with every shaky breath he took. I made him feel this way. For some reason, I now felt worthy of something. I felt like I could move mountains or maybe just a hill. His eyes were such an amazing dark green. His face expression soften when he locked eyes with me. Come to closer Joseph please. I tried to say what I wanted him to do but couldn't. It was too hard. I could barely breathe. 

He raised one eyebrow then asked, "are you going to get up?"

"Yes please."

Wait what did he just ask? Oh no. Oh God no. He looked at me in shock as I scooted back from him. I thought he asked if he could kiss me. 

"Haha, what?"

"Oh, nothing I thought.... never mind I'm sorry."

I stood then started putting my things in my bag. A hand touched on my arm. 

"Are you sure? If you wanted something I can try to give it to you."

"No, it's alright I just thought you asked something else. It's not a big deal."

He let go then walked back.

"So you do want me to help you?"

"Yeah sure."

After packing all seven bags I sat on the pavement outside my building. 

"Hey, you leaving soon?"

"Why you want me to stay?"

"Well, I wouldn't mind spending more time with you."

He sat beside me. How do I leave him? I want to stay but I have questions for my dad and that dream I had last night. It felt so real. It felt like a memory.

"What are you thinking about?"

"Home."

"You can leave now if you want."

I know that but I want to spend time with you.

"Yeah, I know."

"Then why are you still here?"

I looked up at him then saw the guards walking towards us. Oh no, do they know?

"What is it?"

"Nothing I guess I'll go home now bye."

I stood then started walking to the front gate.

"No wait I have to tell you something."

I stopped waiting for him to say it but he never said anything. Once I turned around his attention was on the guards. Look at me before I leave. Please.