The Candydates

1. HOW TO BE INTIMIDATING 101

I stare at the two insensitive douchbags in front of me, contemplating whether or not I should have them put behind bars under the "protection from harassment act, 1897" or was it 1892?  I take a quick glance at the notes saved in my phone. A sigh escapes me on seeing the answer. '1997'

Well that was pretty close. 100 years up or down, no biggy. Its the past  for crying out loud. My professors have surely not heard of the saying "Live in the god damn present."

And I am fortunately or unfortunately best friends with raccoons, who take this very saying wayy too seriously. Their main moto in life is making super spontaneous, zero error plans to have me fail in one test or the other.

Can't I get moderation for the love of God?

"Why? exactly why are you both so inclined towards destroying our future?" I question Jass who has stopped for the forty fifth time to check herself out in the window of a car. I still don't know what she thinks will change  in a nano second.

"First thing, failing in one mock test doesn't destroy anyone's future." One of my two best friends replies with a snort. Jasmine is gorgeous, and the purple sweatshirt dress that she is wearing is further complimenting her dark complexion. She and Ro are like sisters to me, but that doesn't change the fact that I am this close to killing them. 

"And secondly, I can swear on my Gucci leopard print tote bag that you will top. Like always. I will never know how you manage to do it, you witch." she continuous, while making that weird eyebrow-raised-duck-lips face, the females of our species make to check whether we've got mascara on our eyelids.

"You mean swear on your first copy of Gucci cheetah blah blah" I mock.

She gapes at me and is about to show me the receipt she carries everywhere to prove it's so original that its made by Mr.Gucci with his own bare hands (her words not mine), but is cut off by Ro, who pushes her to examine herself.

"Look Em, stop being stubborn and on the contrary, this might just make your future." She says while straightening the top half of her matt black jumpsuit. Initially, I found it a tad bit OTT for a casual on-campus bonfire party but Ro just carries it flawlessly.

"How? please enlighten me?" I ask with a sarcastic smile, ignoring the slap-that-ass and nudge-that-stomach fight for the make shift mirror.

"Adam Carter is going to be there at the bonfire." They say in unison.

Yes so what? I look from  now dolphin face Jass to platypus face Ro and back again.

I wait and wait and wait but nothing else comes out of their mouths.

WAIT. So I was standing here in the middle of the campus, on my way to a stupid bonfire party when I have a history of journalism test next week, just because these two wanted to play match makers?

THIS was it. For THIS I was messing up my schedule. For THIS I let Ro apply my Kylie liquid matt lipstick.For THIS I wore my cute brown skirt and curled my hair. Ahhhhhggg.

Control Em. Control. Deep breaths. In. Out. In. Out. Control. Cont- before I knew it, I was already zipping down my super cute thigh high boots screaming  like a mad woman "I am going to kill you two. I'm going to beat the life out of you with my shoes. I'm-"

Jass interrupts me hesitantly"Em umm those are actually thigh high lace up boots."

I give her my death stare, my hand still on the zipper of my left shoe , balancing my entire weight on my right foot, hopping from time to time and extending my hand in the air to balance myself.