Shattered Glass

McDaniel's- Chapter 11

-Jo- Past

 While I drive, Alex takes a snooze by putting his legs up on my lap and leaning his head against the window. Once his snores fill the air I decide to turn on the radio, even though we're on a run from the government I might as well enjoy myself. The station turns to some kind of baseball game announcer and I quickly turn that off. I turn the nob to the right to a station with classical piano music. I turn it up a little bit and sigh and shrink back into my seat. I've finally got the feeling of anxiety out of me after driving for Alex and waiting for him to question my every move, he didn't though and that made me feel more secure.

I take a right onto an exit because I 've got to go to the bathroom really bad. While I'm turning Alex notices and wakes up. By now it's near dinner time and I can see the hunger in his face.

"We've been driving for hours and I have to go pee," I say bluntly, "You look really hungry."

"Please," he says, putting up a hand, "Don't mention food. I've gone longer without it than this."

I nod my head and stop at a McDaniel's, there was this story going around about how it used to be called something else and how it used to have a mascot. The mascot was a "clown" supposedly. As if those ever existed.

I pull the car over into a parking space, a little crooked. I start to get out of the car.

"Are you coming in?" I ask him, opening my door slightly.

His face shows contemplation, "Fine," he says.

We walk into the restaurant with the smell of fried food quickly filling the air and I have to cover my nose in order to keep my focus on making it to the restroom. I walk into the bathroom giving Alex a quick nod of my head before I enter. He smiles back and winks.

I enter the bathroom with no one else in there, a sigh of relief escapes me and I do my business then walk over to the sink. I look in the mirror and see how truly horrible I look. My hair is in tangles and there's dirt all over my face. I wash my face, rub soap over my hands and wet them. Then I work on my hair, I never had a brush so I basically just run my hands through my hair. I finish with a satisfied feeling and I exit the bathroom. I look for Alex but don't see him in the restaurant, so I walk out to the car. A panicky feeling enters me as I notice he's not in there. I quickly spin around with wide eyes, searching. He's nowhere in my line of vision. I was wrong to trust him, so stupid, Jo. How could you think after all those years you left him, he would stay with you when you're on the most wanted list for the government. And just because you thought he loved you.

I shake my head with tears in my eyes and hop into the car. After that I start the car and back up. In a pretty sloppy manner, to be exact. Suddenly, I hear a bang as something runs into my car and a scream. A man screaming. I jump out of my seat and go to the back of the car where I find a man on the ground in a clump. I gasp and run over to him.

"Oh my goodness!" I say in exasperation, "I am so sorry! Are you alright?" He seems to still be breathing. But his back is to me so I don't know how much damage I did to his face. I roll him over onto his back and find his hair all over his face. I wipe it out of his eyes and notice it's Alex. "Alex," I whisper, "I ran into you?!" His eyes attempt opening and once I see the green in his eyes I almost faint.

"Ouch," he says while sitting up, "next time check to make sure there's no one behind you when you back up." His wince as he smiles says it all. I let out a little giggle and try to help him onto his feet.

"I'm so sorry," I say, putting my hands over my face.

He looks up at me and says, "I know Jo, you already said that." He seems to get into the truck no problem but massages his neck while his face is scrunched up.

"What hurts?" I ask, "Can I get you anything?" I wonder before I start the car.

"We both know that you can't get me anything," he says, looking out the window, then back at me.

I sigh and continue looking forward, "If we're gonna stay together, we're gonna need some money. This engine only has about 2 gallons left."

"I know," he says, "I know."

I sigh as I back up, then switching the stick into drive. Once we're back on the road I take my chances.

"Um, Alex?" I ask, looking over at him, he's placed his forehead against the window and is turned the other direction.

"Yeah," he replies, in the quiet tone. He turns to look at me, I take a glance at him and notice that the bags under his eyes are gone, and his face is completely clean. He must have straightened up in the bathroom too.

"This might be a little weird to ask but um... why were you in the alley? You know, on the other side of the country?" I asked, trying to make it sound a little happier than it really was.

"I-"

"I mean it doesn't really matter if you just decided to go halfway across the country for the heck of it, but I wondered if something happened to you. Or maybe someone beat you up or Kevin found you or something. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to," I say, pausing to bite on my lip, "I mean unless you want to."

"Jo," he says, "I went half way around the country because I-"

Suddenly the car stops. I smack the steering wheel and try to pull over to the side of the road which was a failed attempt. Luckily, we decided it would be better to drive on country roads since we didn't want people to recognize me.

"Well," I say, "that just happened." I turn to Alex who just stares straight ahead.

"I went half way across the country because I'm still in love with you," he says, turning to me. The look he gives me is so ambiguous that I have no idea what he's thinking. It's like chess when he realizes that the move he's just made is so close to winning and decides not to show it. "After you left," he starts again, "I went to your house the next day, expecting you to be there, you know. Your father was always gone at that time but instead of you answering the door it was him. He um, he punched me in the face and told me to get out of his house. I said, 'I don't understand,' and he said, 'where is she? Is she with you?' and I just- I just didn't know what to say. It was like my world had fallen in two, so instead I said, 'no sir, she didn't even say goodbye.' His anger fell and I saw a sliver of hope fall. I didn't want to upset him more so I ran away. He didn't even bother to stop me, once I was in the woods, a good distance from him, I looked back and he was just standing on the steps to his home, staring off in the distance."

I take a breath in and try to swallow. I back up into the side of the door and shake my head. "I-"

"It's okay," he says, scooting a little closer to me, "It's okay," he reaches for my hand. "I just," he says after a moment, "always wondered if I did something wrong." I look over at him as he looks down at our hands.

"No," I say, "It was nothing you ever did. If anything I would have stayed because of you. You're the only reason I made it through my childhood. You were the one that held me while I cried in your arms. You're the one who came to my house every year on March 12th for my birthday and yelled at Kevin on my twelfth birthday because he completely forgot that year. I-" I stutter, "I wouldn't have been able to make it-"

"You got me through it too," he says then, his face forms confusion, "you're the reason I have a purpose Josephine." I jolt at the familiar name coming back to me. The memories that come flooding back to me. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have called you that. I'm just so used to it."

"No," I say, "It's okay, I like it." I smile a short smile.