What Are The Chances?

Too Extra

Y'know, Lolbit maybe should've questioned why her dork friends were cackling amongst themselves, grinning, and exchanging glances while they were setting up the Auditorium earlier in the day, but she just assumed that they were being the typical kind of weird that seemed to spread amongst their friend group.

But as she sat duct taped to a cheap ass plastic Barbie chair in the middle of the auditorium she was regretting her decision.

She groaned loudly.

"Alright ya clowns, what's the deal? I know this is all your doing because I know that this fucking Barbie chair is Foxy's. If you're planning on murdering me for some intentionally/unintentionally stupid thing I did, could you speed up the process? I hate waiting."

A spotlight overhead turned on suddenly. Lolbit hissed like a vampire, on account of her hating light from anything besides a computer screen.

Baby descended from the ceiling, throwing a handful of confetti onto Lolbit. "Surprise, bitch!"

"The hell...?"

She looked up, squinting because of the spotlight.

"Dude, that's so extra. Who the hell is suspending you?"

"Mykie and Zoe."

"What?"

Mykie and Zoe were better known around school as Mangle and Toy Chica.

"Bruh, you got my sister and her fucking girlfriend help you with whatever weird thing this is?"

"Didn't really take a lot of convincing, Lol. We were super down for this."

Lolbit blew a stray strand of hair out of her face. "My dudes, I came here expecting more shit to do, but all I got was confetti and empty promises. It's like I'm in a horror movie and I don't even get to die! I mean, duct tape? Really?."

Baby continued to float above Lolbit, slowing spinning in the air."Yeah, I know duct tape is a bit extreme, but we're on a bit of a time crunch here."

"Well, I have duct taped you to a chair before so I guess it's only fair."

Ballora popped out of... well, who the hell knows where she came from?

"You know, I feel like most normal people don't have conversations this casual in situations like these."

"I think I inhaled confetti. Do you dudes think it'll kill me?"

"Probably not."

"Shit. That sucks. But, if I may inquire, what the fuck is going on? Honestly can't even be mad at the execution of this plan, because that was near perfection. But I'd love to know the purpose of it. What inspired you to do something so over the top? What inspired this batshit craziness?"

Foxy popped out from behind a row of chairs. "Well, you see, that dance is tomorrow..."

Lolbit let out an overly prolonged 'Ohhhhh'. "I see where this is going."

"You have to come with us to the dance, man. You've come with us every year before."

"Yeah, well, in past years I didn't have to go alone because you were still single and ready to mingle, my dude."

"Wait, you and Lolbit used to go together?" Ballora interrupted.

"Yeah, it was disastrous. Last year she put two sausages in a cup of punch and handed it to me. I didn't realize until it was too late." Baby shuddered at the memory.

Ballora raised an eyebrow."Wait, where did Lolbit get sausages at the dance?"

"Trade secret, my guy."

"Did you bring them? Did you just find them?"

"I can't disclose that information."

"Okay, getting back on track." Baby interrupted. "You don't have to go alone if you ask someone, dumbass."

"Bold of you to assume I have someone I would want to ask."

"Oh really? You sure there aren't any dork boys that run around with rabbit puppets that you like?"

"I'mmmm prettttyyy sure."

As everyone continued to stare at Lolbit with suspicion, she caved.

"Okay, fine. I will ask Freddy to the dance. But only because I know you're gonna be as obnoxiously persistent as I was with you and Ballora."

"Well, that was slightly easier than anticipated. Perhaps we didn't need to tape her to a chair." Ballora said.

"Oh no, you did. Def woulda fuckin bolted if you didn't."

"Nevermind then."