Prison Cells and Broken Hearts

Prison Cells and Broken Hearts - Chapter 9

{Hinata POV}

I sit in my lavishly decorated bedroom, intricate weaving's covering the blankets of my uncomfortable bed.  I do not sit on that bed, I sit on the floor, the colors of of burgundy and gold adorning the carpet beneath me as I draw.  I draw my story.  Two hands are depicted, one of a man, and one of a female.  They're reaching for one another, yet a bloodied barbed wire fence separates the two.  The man's hand is also splattered in blood, as the woman's appendage is imposingly adorned.  A ring on her ominously poised finger, beaded bracelets covering her wrist in a crowded mess.

I finish splattering the ink onto the paper, then gently place it into a little box kept beneath my bed.  The box consists of varying sentimentality: letters in which shall never be read, the red hairband Neji gave me when we were children, and of course: paintings, drawings and inking of my own. 

That box is all I've had to cling to for comfort since I moved into my 'fiance's' mansion; god knows he could'nt offer me such a thing.  It's not that Hideo isn't a decent man, for he is.  It's just that he is cut from the same cloth as I, for our hearts belong to that of another.  Hideo is kind, he is sweet... generous, even.  I enjoy his company, as he does mine.  We get along, yet we both succumb to the unspoken agreement that our relationship personally ends there. 

I mend Hideo's tattered clothes, and we kiss as if we know a baby sleeps in all our bones so scared to be alone... but I still sit with the window closed I'll sit and think of Neji.  I sent him one of the many letters that lay inside of my box, but who knows if it's reached him or not.

I've always been somewhat in love with the idea of Neji, even when I was a child.  I'd always loved him, in a sense.  I will, come autumn's end, have to witness him in his demise.  Hideo and I spoke once of my affair with my cousin, and he'd seemed quite understanding... even empathetic, yet I know he's been caught in a similar situation some years ago; with a woman from the Yamanaka clan.  Like me, since he is also from the main house, was set free with the intention of marrying someone like me.

I hope the letter has reached my love, and I suppose I may never know if it has, or not... but autumn has just begun and I feel the air thickening with the anticipation of catastrophe.  I try not to think about the light in Neji's eyes fading as I watch, yet at four in the morning, my most loneliest hours, I find myself weeping in silence.