it's not a curse, they say, it's just you [is it me] it's just you and you get bored you get tired you get selfish [i get selfish] you like to own people you like to suck them in and spit them out you like to make people into gobstoppers you like to make them small [do i] when people come to you they are big and when you are done with them they are nothing they are small [i make them small] it's just you.
it's just you.
it's just me.
but how can it be just me there's two of us here and you aren't the same anymore you aren't on your best behaviour [what is best behaviour why are we fake] you are selfish too you are more selfish than me but you keep it quiet and you don't make a fuss and i do [and it's crazy it makes me crazy] you don't love me you just love an idea of me and i loved an idea of you but the difference is i tried to love the reality as well and you didn't [you didn't] you failed i failed we failed so it's not just me
it's us.
over and over again.
the first us the first time under the covers and the fire alarm went off
the second us and i loved your family i loved them more than you
the third us and you were my best friend but it wasn't enough
the fourth us you didn't get me you didn't get me you didn't get me
and the fifth. still going.
YOU ARE READING
eleven months
Poetrya collection of 12 poems about the befores and afters of love. some mature themes. ★ 3RD PLACE POETRY: the annual medley awards 2018 ★
