His Salvation

Part Twenty Two

Aditya looked up at the stars, "I" he coughed loudly "I" there was a loud sigh before he continued "I'm mad at you, so" he clenched his fist, teeth gritted "So damn mad, that you are dead, I don't know how to do this, isn't it meant to be a father's job to teach their son how to be a man, I don't know how to be a man, a good enough man for her" he stumbled forward, his arms swaying "Where are you when I need you, how, how do I be"

"Aditya" Zoya called, rushing into the garden, her bare feet rustling in the grass as she reached him "Aditya, it's cold, lets"

"Beautiful" he turned to face her "My beautiful Zoya" he raised a hand to her cheek then stopped when she flinched "Are you scared, don't be scared, please, I would never hurt you, promise" he jutted his bottom lip out, his brown eyes lightened to a hazel as they widened and a tear rolled down his cheek

"Aditya, are you drunk, you need to rest, lets" she wrapped her fingers around his wrist, but he still didn't make any movement

"Do you really think, that I" he pointed at himself "That I am a good man, your good man"

Zoya nodded "You are, my good man, why do you think that you're bad" she instantly regretted asking the question as soon as the words left her mouth

"I love you Zoya, really, really love you, I just want you to keep seeing me as good, your good man, Zoya's good man, and Zoya's good man doesn't hurt anyone, Zoya's good man doesn't do, doesn't do drugs, he is just Zoya's good man"

"Hurt anyone, drugs, Aditya I don't understand, you take drugs, you hurt someone, who did you"

"No" Aditya shouted "Zoya's good man doesn't do that" he frowned when she jumped back "I scared you, now you'll go, please don't go, i'll do anything, I, wait, look" he fell to his knees "Look, I am begging my Zoya not to go, I love you, I don't know how to live without you" he looked up at her, his eyes a dreadful mirror of a hideous storm

"Aditya, please" Zoya gripped his muscular arms, trying once again to pull him up "I am here, but I need to understand, did you hurt someone Aditya, please just tell me the truth"

He nodded

Zoya sucked in a harsh breath "How badly, how badly did you hurt them"

"If I say, you will leave, and I don't want you to leave, I, you can hurt me if you want to, will that make it better, I want to make it better, I want to be your good man again" Aditya placed his hands on her hips, his neck ached from continuously looking up at her, but he couldn't look away, he needed Zoya to think good of him again

"I don't want to hurt you Aditya, but I want an answer, how badly did you hurt people, was it self defence, or" she stopped, shaking her head

"Not self defence, I was defending other people"

Zoya exhaled loudly, bending down she cupped his face "See, you are still my good man, you've protected people, how could I ever hate you for that" her eyes filled with tears "Can I be honest with you, just this once because you probably won't remember in the morning"

Aditya nodded "Pa, Zoya doesn't hate me, i'm still her good man, it's okay, we're okay, aren't we Zoya" he nodded

"We are" she paused, sitting in front of him "You know you said you love me"

"I do love you, I do" he held her hands in his own "I love my Zoya"

"Don't stop" her voice cracked "Don't stop loving me, I know it's selfish, but I don't want you to stop, I want you to always love me, not anyone else, not, not Pooja"

"Don't cry" his voice softened "Please don't cry, I will always love you, I will never love anyone else, I promise, you are all I want"

Zoya shuffled forward, cupping his face with her now freezing cold hands "I'm so scared Aditya, I wish I had met you first, I don't want it to be too late, I don't want you to find better, I"

Aditya moved forward quickly, one hand rested on the back of Zoya's neck, the other on her waist, then he was kissing her, somewhere in his head he knew he shouldn't have been, but he couldn't think straight with the alcohol in his system. Her lips were soft, still then they were moving with his, he felt her hands drop to his shoulders, pulling him closer as she kissed him back, then she shoved her body back and gasped "Zoya, i'm so"

"I kissed you back" she looked down at her hands in shock "I even, pulled you closer, women, they're not allowed to do that when kissing, unless the man says, oh no" she sobbed "What have I"

Aditya felt like an ice cold bucket of water had been poured on him "Zoya" he whispered "Zoya, you can touch me, you remember what I said about not controlling you, if we kiss, you can touch me, anytime, come here" he held her wrists, bringing them to his chest "It's normal to do this when kissing someone Zoya, it's normal to kiss back"

"It is" she raised a brow "Yash said I wasn't allowed to, not when we kissed like that, said it was distracting, when he kissed me, it always hurt, it doesn't hurt when you, I don't understand, all this time I thought, because he said, and I"

Aditya looked away, Yash was dead but still he had affected her, taught her things that were completley wrong, it was as if even breathing was on a schedule for her, he had throughly underestimated how her life had been before, but not anymore. "What is love, for you"

"Giving yourself to someone, you do everything they want you to, even if you don't want to"

"No, that's not love, Zoya, love is never ever about being forced to do something you don't want to, you're allowed to feel, allowed to say no, allowed to touch"

Zoya raised her hands that were now in her lap and edged towards him, then stopped "So, I can do this" her fingers traced his jawline, her arms quickly wrapped around his waist as she moved into the warmth of his arms, she looked up at him still trying to ensure it was okay, her brows furrowed when he looked down at her, his eyes hooded. She leant up pressing a kiss to his jaw "You promise, you'll only love me"

He blinked slowly "Of course, only you, you're freezing, we need to go inside" he lifted her up and began walking inside, then up the stairs he placed her on the bed "So cold" he turned and grabbed a jumper, handing it to her, a small smile formed on his lips when she looked down at the sleeves dangling over her hands

"Wait, where are you going" Zoya asked, alarmed

"To sleep downstairs" he replied slowly

"No, sleep here, with me" she grabbed his arm, pulling him to the bed, then led his head in her lap "I want to look after you too, like you look after me" she rested her hand in his hair, twirling his hair around her hand

"I've never been" he cleared his throat but that didn't seem to take away the squeakiness in his voice "I've never been looked after before"

Zoya felt her heart crumble "I will always look after you, I promise" she looked up at Aditya as he sat up, pulling her down she opened her arms, smiling when he led in her arms, his head resting on her shoulder, his tears now rolling onto her neck "It's okay Aditya, you're safe now"