Another Broken Girl

Chapter 24

"You should." I blurt out.

What the fuck am I saying?

"Oh," she says shocked, "I guess I can stay for a little while."

The boys cheer as she sits in the back with Calum and Michael as I sit in front with Ashton. The whole way home I was thinking about how weird it's going to feel to have Ali inside of my apartment again.  She hasn't stepped foot inside since the day she left.

"We're here!" Ashton says happily.

We all head up to my apartment and end up just sitting on the couches as usual once we are in. All except Ali.

"Wow. This is getting full." Ali says looking at the wish wall.

"Oh, yeah. We all still write down wishes once we think of one." Michael says standing next to her. 

"It is getting pretty full." Ashton says walking over to them as well. 

"That's nice." she says tracing the wishes with her fingertips. 

We all decide to play a game of Would You Rather in the living room. Except it was mostly just Michael and Calum going back and forth with Ashton dropping in once in a while.

"If you excuse me, I'm going to use the bathroom." Ali says getting up and heading towards the bathroom.

"Would you rather kiss a goose or a cow?" Ashton asks Calum.

"Definitely a cow." Calum replies.

"I agree." Michael says.

"Would you rather drink squid ink or cat pee?" Calum asks Michael.

"That's just foul." Michael says in disgust.

"Just answer it." Calum says.

"I'll have to go with," he says stroking his chin, "the squid."

"That's just gross." Ashton comments.

"You would drink the cat piss?" Michael asks him.

"I think it's time to go." Ashton says looking at the time. As all the boys leave Ali comes back from the bathroom.

"They left already?" Ali asks me.

"Yeah." I say.

"I better get going then." she says as she walks towards the door with me following her.

"You know, you can stay if you want." I say scratching the back of my neck.

"Why would I do that." she asks.

"Oh, well," I say trailing off embarrassed, "I don't know. We can watch a film or something."

"Sure. I guess." she says unsure.

——

I don't know how this happened, but here we are. In the living room watching Mean Girls. I'm laying down on the couch while Ali sitting on the other.

"Ali." I say.

"Yeah?" she says.

"Come here." I say patting next to me.

"I'm not laying down with you." she says.

"Please."

"No."

I don't know why I'm doing this. Why am I doing this? I guess it's just really late at night and I'm not thinking straight. Plus I'm under the influence. Either way I have this urge to hold her tight and don't let go.

"But, it's my birthday." I protest.

"So?"

"Just come here."

She groans, but she gives up and lays next to me. It feels right having her beside me. When our hands brushed against each other I felt my hand tingle and all of a sudden start to get hot.

The film ends, but we're still cuddled up next to her. Her head is against my chest and the crook of my neck is on top of her head. I'm not sure if she's sleeping, but I don't even care. This just feels so right.

"I should get going." she says looking up at me.

"Stay a little longer." I whisper pushing a lock of hair behind her ear.

"Why?" she whispers.

"I don't know." I say honestly.

We look into each other's eyes and say nothing. I tighten the grip I have around her waist bringing her closer to me.

I place my hand on her cheek and rub my thumb against it. The next thing I know I'm inching my head closer to hers, and she does too. Once our faces are so close I break the space between our lips.

It takes me a while to process that we're actually doing. The kiss is soft and slow. I don't know why we're doing this, but I don't really mind.

"Oh god." She says breaking us apart and jumps off of the couch.

"Ali." I say sitting up.

"No, no, no." she says pacing the floor.

"This," she says pointing in between me and her, "never happened."

"Never happened?" I asked hurt.

"I have to go." she says going to the door.

"You don't have to leave." I say following her.

"Yes I do." she says putting on her shoes.

"Why are you freaking out?" I ask.

"Because!" she yells.

"Because." she says quieter while putting one hand over her face.

"Because what?" I ask softly.

"I don't want to get hurt." she whispers.

"I will never hurt you."

She looks up at me like she's trying to make a choice. She looks so scared and vulnerable.

"I have to go." she says storming out of my apartment.

Once the door slams shut I sigh. I'm not too sure about what just happened. My mind is racing and my heart is beating insanely.

I start to head into my room until I see the wrapped box that Ali gave me on the table. I pick it up and start to unwrap it neatly. When the wrapping is all gone it's a black rectangular box. I scrunch my eyebrows together in confusion of what it might be.

I lift the lid up too see six guitar picks sitting in a row. I smile at the different colored picks. I close the box and bring it to my room. 

As I'm about to turn the knob to my room I look behind me to see Ali's door. I let go of the knob and head towards her room that she no longer lives in.

Once I'm in the room it looks so empty. I remember how messy it was in here. There were so many clothes laying around everywhere.

I sigh and lay down on the bed. The sheets still smelled like her. I feel like a weirdo going into her room and laying in her bed, but that's not the biggest thing on my mind.