Carter Ortese is Trouble - completed (The Boys #1)

Chapter 20: Emma

I park, turn off the engine, and get out of the car. A breeze rolls over my skin, but it's nearly silent here.

"You want to walk?" Carter asks.

I'm not looking at him, but he seems to know exactly what I need. He uses his phone light to guide us through the thicket and into the clearing. We stand there, both looking up at the night sky.

Eventually, Carter breaks the silence. "Georgia won?"

"We tied." There's a moment where I look at him, expecting him to tell me it's not so bad, but he doesn't. "And now that I'm not solo lead, I feel so ..." I let my voice trail off, not exactly sure how I feel.

"Out of control?"

"Stop doing that." I cross my arms.

He shrugs. Carter's face holds no malice, but instead a consistent thread of understanding. His lips are parted, hair a bit of a mess, and eyes resting easily on me. There's curiosity there, like he is willing to listen to anything I have to say.

"Yeah." The word escapes my lips. "Like I lost the only thing I had that was truly me." I turn away from him, walking a few paces and looking up at the sky. It's full of stars. I'm at the edge of a whirlpool, my emotions spiral and threaten to carry me away.

When Carter remains silent, waiting for me to fill in the gap, it gives me enough strength to do so.

I suck in a breath and start talking. "You know I can't appreciate stars anymore? When I look up at them, all I can think about is hydrogen, helium, and combustion. All I can think about is how the closest star is over four light years away. All I can think about is the science that my parents have jam packed into my head."

I turn to Carter. His frown has so much sympathy, it makes me want to cry. "The only time I'm not running through equations and remembering little known facts is when I'm playing clarinet. It's the one true thing that belongs to me, and I feel like that's being taken away." I cross my arms, realizing how crisp the air is. I look back at the stars, wishing I could see their beauty, the way someone else would.

Carter's feet crunch in the tall grass as he makes his way over to me. He wraps his arms around my waist. I lean back against his chest, feeling his warmth and strength flood into me. I keep my gaze trained up at the lights above us. We're in the middle of no where, and the sky is so bright. The moon is waxing gibbous, about to be full in just a few days.

"I hate it," I whisper.

"I know," he says, his breath coming so close to my ear that it makes me shiver. He holds me like I'm full of helium, a balloon about to drift away on the slightest breeze.

Maybe I am.

"Take another look." His voice is calm and level.

"I'm still looking."

"Close your eyes."

I do.

He brings his fingers up to my hair, brushing strands away from my neck. His lips press against my skin, feather-light. "How about now?" His voice is low and husky.

I open my eyes and look up at the stars. My skin is on fire from where he kissed me. The stars are ignited, burning brighter than I've seen before. The fiery lights dance in the sky, igniting the universe with something more magical than science, more fantastic than calculations, and more wondrous than any words I've ever read.

"Thank you." My voice is barely a whisper in the open night air.

He places another kiss on my neck, and I twist around to face him and meet his gaze. "I mean it."

"I'm sorry about your chair," he says. "And I'm sorry about your science-filled brain."

I bark out a laugh and rest my head against his chest, listening to his steady heart beat. "I'm not sorry, because I can tell your heart is beating faster than normal." I pull back, giving us enough space to look at each other again. My thoughts cease as I gaze up at him.

Carter's blue eyes have narrowed, looking steely underneath the silver moonlight. "Maybe I'm dying. You never know."

"Are you?" My voice drips in mockery. 

"Only inside, when I see the girl I'm falling for in such disharmony with the world."

The smile fades from my lips as I process his words. Falling for. My eyes search his, because it's impossible for me to remember who Carter Ortese is supposed to be. The Carter I know doesn't fall in love, and according to my parents, I shouldn't fall in love either. Not now, not so soon. But have we? Are we? Is that what this is?

I bring my lips to his, tired of listening to my own brain. Tired of hearing all the reasons I shouldn't plunge head first off this cliff. I want to dive. I want to get lost in the swells of the seas. I want to hang on to this feeling of anticipation for as long as I can.

He receives my kisses with tender, searching ones of his own. His arms wrap around my waist, and he draws me to him, until the space between us disappears. I grab the back of his neck, wanting to bring us closer together. We move in unison, and he somehow tastes like peppermint. I want more. I want to feel this forever.

Carter pulls away first, breathing deeply. He presses his forehead against mine. "You drive me crazy."

"I think that's the best place to be."

Smiling, he kisses my forehead, and I savor the feel of his lips against my skin. "Come on. We need to get going, else my mom might call the cops."

"Yeah, I can only help Mika study for so long."

"What?" One of his eyebrows arch upward.

I shake my head, unwrapping myself from him. "You know, I'm always studying, every hour of the day. At least, that's what my parents think." I pull my keys out of pocket, twirling them with my fingers. The cold air licks my skin, and despite how tired I feel, I know I'm going to be okay. "Let's go."

- - - - -

What are your thoughts on Emma's reaction to losing her lead seat? How is Carter's reaction to her?

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