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/Jungkook POV/

After a few weeks I was discharged and was able to come back home, but the thing is I don't know who is Namjoon, Seokjin or Jin since he likes being called that too, or Yoongi? My memories.... I don't remember anything, besides the people here, I supposedly am 20...? Wait scratch that I'm 21... my birthday passed already...

Jiminie and Hoseokie hyung don't let me near sharp things... maybe since I'm itching to take a knife near my skin and cut it..? Maybe... who am I kidding? Of course that is the reason.. It makes the voices go away for a bit...

"Jungkook you know nobody cares for you~ why don't you end it?"

"You worthless waste of space... why can't you die?!"

"Yeah listen to him... He is your father...."

Good think they're the only one one's speaking. There name is Self hate and  Depression.... Self Hate sound like dad..? And the other one like B-bogum? The name sounds so familiar.... I slowly came back to the world thinking "If I was gone... would that be better.. if I wasn't breathing?"

I kept thinking until I heard someone cough to get my attention. I looked up, to see Jiminie hyung in front of me... I was just sitting on my bed? I don't know if this is my bed, I hope it is. Jimin walked over and sat next to me and asked, "Hey Jungkookie, how is everything?" Honestly I wanted to lir and say I'm fine, but I think he would have noticed.. "It's okay... I-I don't know why but the name Bogum sounds so familar..." I spoke in a whisper and looked down at my lap.

Jimin was shocked to hear that, he slowly said to me, "Bogum... he was Taehyung's boyfriend... you had a crush on Taehyung, but you let Taehyung be with him," I was shocked to hear that Bogum took my crush away from me... but who am i kidding he was better looking than me.. Jimin continue speaking, "The reason why they broke up was because Bogum cheated on with another person.." He looked at me and sadly smiled, I slowly looked up and faked a smile, but in the inside I felt like dying... Jimin slowly got close to me and hugged me tightly, and whispered, "I don't want to lose you again.... I can't...." I slowly hugged him back.

"You won't... I promise..." I whispered back, even though I knew I can't keep that promise even if I wanted to.. I'll never be able to keep it. Jimin broke the hug and kissed my cheek before leaving me alone, with my mind.. It was getting late so I slowly laid myself in my bed, thinking of what life without me would be like? Probably better..

-The next day-

I woke up, my body felt like someone dragged me up the stairs and then down on repeat. I stared at my white colored ceiling, not wanting to get up from my warm and comfy bed, but I had too. I slowly got up from my comfy bed and headed towards the bathroom.

After brushing my teeth, and doing other things. I walked out of the bathroom to see Jiminie and Hoseokie making out with I think Yoongay- I mean Yoongi!! Not Yoongay... I slowly walked backwards back into the bathroom for a while, and waited for at least 10 minutes before going back out. Oh thank god they left, I slowly walked back to my room, to see that it wad locked! I place my ear near the door to hear moans?! UMmM. What are they doing?

-¡Self-harm warning!-

I had to walk to the living room, and nobody was there, I think the others are still asleep. So I look a pair of scissors that were in the living room and slowly started to cut myself with it, I felt a sting from my first cut, but the others were numb. I felt my blood slowly dripping on my wrist. It felt... nice.

I slowly looked down to my thighs.. why not do it there too? I slowly pulled down my shorts and started to cut there as well.

Nobody cares anyway... they're lying about caring about me.. I slightly whimpered because of the pain from my cuts.. I did this to myself.. I deserve this, don't I? All I am is a burdern... a mistake.. a waste of space... I. Am. Nothing. I slowly looked down and looked at all my cuts.. I slowly went and washed thepair if scissors and slowly bandaged my cuts, and pulled up my shorts, I hope nobody notices.. They wouldn't care anyway..

-Self-harm part done-

I placed the bandages back in the first aid kit and placed it back in the cabinet. I placed the scissors back in there original spot, I slowly dragged my feet to my room, and tried to open the door, and it was still locked.

I knocked on it, and the door opened to Hoseokie hyung in only boxers and he was sweating... I wonder what they did? Anyway Hoseok said while blushing, "I'm sorry about what we did in your room... I feel terrible- Jungkook, why do you have a bandage on your wrist and arm?" I quickly thought of an excuse, "I accidently scratched my arm." He looked at me with a suspicous look, but nodded. I looked over his shoulder to see a naked Yoongi hyung, I see his, umm... blah blah.

I quickly left, and sat in the living room, and watched some pokémon, to speed up time, hoping the others wake up soon.

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946 words. This was a long chapter.. anyway hello!

How are you?
How is/was your day?
Did you eat?

Anyway the next chapter is probably coming out a bit later... I hope I didn't misspell horribly or make a horrible grammar mistake. Anyway, bye for now!

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