A Fighting Chance (Tom Holland AU) [2]

Twenty-Three

"Better physically than emotionally." She sighed gently, taking my hand as Tom carefully joined me back on the bed. "I don't know what happened. Everything was going fine, but she's nine weeks early."

"Tom told us the situation as we walked. I can't imagine what you're going through." She whispered softly as she rubbed my hand. "Have you seen Annabelle yet?"

"Not yet, no."

"Let's all take a trip to the NICU. We'll get you a wheelchair, and you can go see her. I'm sure she's gorgeous." I nodded at that, and she gave me a gentle smile.

As Tom pushed the wheelchair towards the NICU, I reached my hand back and rested it on top of his. His parents were walking beside us, and as soon as we got to our destination, I bit my lip softly. Tom leaned down and pressed a kiss to my head, and I gave him a soft smile.

We were met with the doctor, who led us over to an area where we could see her. I noticed a clear covered shelter where she was laying, all wired and tubed up for monitoring and so they could help her breathe. "She's so beautiful..." I didn't know if I'd be able to talk at full volume for a while.

"Just like her mother." Tom rested a hand on my shoulder, and I smiled as I leaned my head down to press a kiss to his hand.

"If you'd like, you can hold her from there." I looked up at the doctor, and she gestured to the two covered openings of the shelter. "We can't let her out of there just yet because we want to make sure the air she's breathing is as pure as possible, but we can let you hold her that way."

"Can I?" I could feel more tears, and the doctor nodded as a nurse brought some hand sanitizer for me. As I got settled with her in my arms, I could feel more tears slipping down my cheeks.

"You're going to be great, Grace. I can just tell." Nikki's voice was still gentle, and I took a deep breath.

"I hope so."

The next day was yet another blur, and before I knew it, I was being given discharge papers for myself. As I looked at them, I realized that meant Annabelle wouldn't be able to come home with us.

Saying my heart shattered was a major understatement.

The nurse informed us that the hospital could give us a courtesy room for the night so we could stay with our baby girl, and as soon as we were in that room, I was sobbing in Tom's arms as we sat on the bed. "I'm so sorry," I whispered, and he shook his head.

"Grace, none of this is your fault. She thought she was ready to meet the world." I looked up at him, and I could see tears welling in his eyes. "Please don't blame yourself."

We spent a long time there, both crying as we held each other close in that bed. I wanted nothing more than to hold my daughter close, and the fact that I couldn't hurt me more than I ever thought I'd be hurt.

Once we had cried ourselves dry for the time being, I looked up at him. "We should go see her."

And so, we walked hand in hand to our daughter. As we approached, I could see that she was awake and looking around. I smiled at that, and she locked her eyes on me. I'm not sure if I was seeing things or this was real, but it seemed like she was actually smiling at me, and the mere thought brought a smile to my face. "She really is gorgeous." I heard Tom whisper, and I nodded gently.

"We did that. We really made a beautiful baby girl." He smiled as he let go of my hand and wrapped his arms around me from behind. "I love you."

"Was that to me or to her, darling?"

"Both of you," I whispered, smiling back at him before looking at Annabelle.

As we woke up in our courtesy room the next day, I heard my phone ringing. "Hello?"

"Hi there, hon. We just landed, and Tom's parents are taking us to their house before we all head to the hospital to meet you guys. We'll be there soon." I smiled slightly at the sound of my mother's voice.

"I can't wait." I grinned gently as I looked over at Tom sleeping soundly. "I told you guys what the situation is, right?"

"Yes you did, baby." I heard her sigh at that. "If it's okay with you, this is something I'd like to talk about in person."

"Oh, of course. We'll see you when you get here, okay?"

"Okay, baby." As I bid my goodbye and hung up, I could see Tom wake up.

"Morning, darling." He yawned softly, and I grinned.

"Morning. You hungry? We could grab a bite to eat nearby."

As we finished our breakfast, I looked up to see my parents walk in. I hugged them both tightly. "I'm so glad you're here. Would you guys like to meet her?"

As my mom, my dad, Tom, and I walked to the NICU, I felt my mom take my hand. I smiled up at her, and as we turned the corner to where Annabelle was, I heard my mom take a deep breath. "Wow." I could tell she was shocked by everything she was connected to.

"I know, it's a lot." I sighed, leaning my head on her shoulder.

"She's beautiful, Grace." I smiled gently, taking a deep breath. She was sleeping at the moment, and I could feel tears welling in my eyes. My mom looked over at me and pulled me over to two chairs nearby. "What's going through your mind?"

"I don't know what I did wrong, mommy," I whispered as tears began to fall, and she shook her head as she pulled me close. "I read all the books, avoided everything my doctor told me to, and I made sure to get enough sleep, even with my busy schedule. I don't know how I fucked up."

Thoughts?