Temporary Bliss | Jimin ✔

II

If someone had informed you today that you'd feel a strong, prickling sensation in your chest as if there were a million needles impaling your heart, you would've never agreed to go out. But no one had warned you about this.

You were in an extremely good mood the minute you woke up because an amusement park is the whole group's outing destination for today—it was something planned and booked weeks ago and a break from all the studying you've done for the week is what you exactly needed.

At Jimin's flat, you're sitting on the couch of his living room while he readies himself, hearing him moving stuff about in his room, making you curious at how much time he needs to get dressed.

The plan was that you'll go there together, with him driving, because everyone, including Taehyung, believes that you're dating. Yes, this stunt that you two are performing is still happening and it isn't going to end while the goal is still not being attained.

While waiting, you could not help but think about everything that's happened in your life these past few weeks. It still feels weird that you're pretending to be someone's girlfriend when in reality, you aren't really his. You and Jimin are deceiving everyone around you with a fabricated lie just so you can have the person you want.

Along with everything that has happened, you saw how he's fun to be with the more you spend time with him, with just the two of you and that was something you were getting used to now. Jimin, as you look back at his actions in hindsight, isn't the cocky guy who flirts with every girl that approaches and tries to cling onto him as if they're leeches, he isn't the guy who tries to make the ladies feel as if they're the most important people in the world, as if they're the only one on his radar.

Instead, he's the guy who makes sure if you are okay, texting you in between lectures just so he could say anything that would make your lips curve upward. He's the guy who, when anyone isn't looking, asks for your thoughts instead of trying to take the lead with how you two would act in front of Taehyung, making sure that you're comfortable and in this, you're surprised.

With eyes only on you now and his attention solely focused on you, he holds your hand, his chin often finding its resting place on your shoulder as back hugs are a huge thing for him—you concluded this since he always does it to you. He's the guy whose touch is something you're getting used to as if the mechanics of your body altered its response to him, as if every cell of your body is focused on him, too. As if he's meant to permanently linger in your skin and in your life.

You wanted to question him then because the way he was being affectionate and caring in public as if he's treating everything as real gave your stomach a plummeting and sinking feeling that it felt overly unconventional, it was something you weren't used to but you didn't asked and just kept your curiosity in mind.

It was as if he's internalized the role, assimilating to it fully but maybe that was just your foolish thinking because he would never see this as real. For him, this is just something for fun, it's just him simply helping you get a guy who you're not sure feels the same way as you do. You have no idea where your feelings stand anymore, the contents of your mind and heart are a clutter, your feelings are nebulous and you know that you need to do some long and hard thinking if you want to find an emotional clarity.

The black notebook lying on his coffee table catches your attention and you pick it up and scan the pages mindlessly. There were lecture notes in there, complex and lengthy equations that it feels like you were going to have a migraine just by staring at them and you wonder why Jimin chose such a tricky and intricate subject as his degree.

He had neatly listed his tasks too in this notebook, coming to the realisation that he does care about his studies after all, contrary to your initial preconceptions about him. Deadline dates were underlined twice, doodles were also present on the corners of the pages that made your lips curved upwards at the uniqueness and diversity of his little drawings and you imagine him scribbling these while bored on lectures.