Forbidden / Shayne Topp

Fifty: The Book

I needed to do this.

I click delete and they all disappeared. I know they were going to my recently deleted, but at least I know they'll delete on its own. I kept scrolling to the top until I got to the Winter Games photos and I caught my eye on a specific photo. When I clicked the photo, I softly smiled to see it was the photo that Veronica had talked about before. The photo of me hugging Veronica since I was covered in snow and was getting payback. I chuckled and scrolled through the pictures to find a video of her face on it. I clicked play and started to watch it.

"Shayne," she had said to me as she moved the camera to face both of us. I looked at the camera and looked back up since we were walking. "How does it feel to win this years Winter Games with your team, The Spaghetti Yetis?"

"You know, it feels great. I feel like I really accomplished something and everyone was such a great help into making us the best team. You were no help an-"

"Man, shut up," Ronnie said as her and I both started laughing, but then Boze jumped up at the camera and Ronnie moved it down so Boze could be shown.

"That's right y'all. Your boi won her first Winter Games and she's ready for Summer Games. My team is coming at ya!" Boze yelled at the camera. She started laughing as she walked away from us, and Veronica and I shook our heads and laughed at her.

"You excited for Summer Games?" Ronnie asked me.

"Always am. Maybe this time you can join and try to win with us. Or better yet, be on separate teams and I'll kick your ass," Shayne joked.

"Sure you would, but we shall see!" she said smiling into the camera. "By the way, this is you phone. I don't know how you didn't realize I had it."

Ronnie looked at me with the biggest smile on her face and I looked at her and reached over to grab my phone. "You son of a-" and I grabbed my phone and the video ended with the slight giggles of Veronica.

My smile started fading and I locked my phone while feeling a tear go down my cheek. This really did suck and I just wished that I didn't have to feel this way about Veronica. I leaned my head back on my couch and I turned to look over at my bookshelf, but my eyes caught onto one of the books that had something sticking out of it. I got up and left my phone on the couch and walked over to the bookshelf. It was The Great Gatsby book and when I picked it up, not only did the photo of Frankie and I fall out, but two other different things did too.

I squatted down on the floor and sat the book next to me while grabbing the photo of Frankie and I. Her hair was this dirty blonde and she was laughing while burying her face into my chest where my hair was still that brown color and I was just smiling. I smiled and put it back in the book, but my eyes caught onto a Polaroid picture. I grabbed it and my heart sank when I saw it was a photo of Veronica and I. It was a company party celebrating the one year the squad had been there and it was a photo that Courtney had taken of Veronica and I when we were drunk.

Our mouthes were wide open from laughing and my left arm was around her while her left hand was placed on my chest. I remembered this night like it was yesterday since we both were wasted out of our minds and it took us forever to just get this one photo, but Courtney kept laughing and still managed to get this priceless photo. I forgot all about this night and I didn't even think about where this photo was. I picked up the piece of paper that laid on the floor as well and I stood back up and walked back over to the couch.

I sat the picture next to my keys and sat back on the couch while I unfolded the paper. My eyes widen when I noticed it was Veronica's handwriting. She wrote me a letter?

Dear Shayne,

If you're reading this, then Damien is a sweet boy who did me a solid. I know it's a bit old fashioned that I wrote you a letter, but nothing is more unfashioned than having paperback books on a bookshelf. Seriously, Shayne? There's Kindles now. Take advantage of the technology we have.

I chuckled and shook my head. I hated her so much sometimes. I looked back at the letter and kept reading.

Shayne, I'm so sorry for everything. I'm sorry for playing with your heart and giving you false hope of being together when I just made everything worse. I kept holding onto a dead end relationship and now, I'm leaving to move with Elliot and live with the fact I did hurt you. I know we both caused this, but I'm finally able to take responsibility for the shit I've done. I only hope the next girlfriend of yours doesn't hurt you because I know I did and I never wanted to.

Ever since you told me about Frankie, I wanted to be the best girlfriend you'd ever have, but we didn't get together until Anthony and I broke up and then we broke up a few days after that since I decided to throw the offer on you. I don't hate you for telling me to go; I would've told you the same thing if you were in my shoes since I'm known for making excuses, but this was the one time I wasn't and I wanted to know what you thought. And you told me, but I knew it was all bullshit.

I'm leaving because I have too. I'm not leaving you; I'm leaving the person who I've become behind so I can go back to being who I use to be. I want to be the girl who knows what she wants and hopes that in the future, she won't repeat what happened in the past. Shayne, I love you and I'm going to miss you so much. Leaving is the hardest thing I had to do since I've fallen in love with my best friend (yes you, not Tristan. That's gross), but I'll never forget about you. How could I forget those beautiful blue eyes, that insane loud laugh, and that adorable smile?

Because I couldn't.

I only hope that you make a girl even happier than you made me and I hope she treats you right because if not, my ass will be back in seconds and I'll kick her ass. I don't know how I'll find out about it but I will and I'll fight the bitch.

I chuckled and another tear went down my cheek.

This is probably the weirdest letter you've ever gotten, but that's what makes this special. I love you, Shayne. I'll see you soon.

Love, Ron (even though you know I hate this name) aka, your doll face

She ended it with a small heart and I looked up at the ceiling taking deep breaths. She wrote this as her goodbye and it was what I needed for closure, but my thoughts were interrupted when there was a knock at the door. The door opened and Damien walked in. "Hey, man. I just wanted to check up on you," he said.

"At three in the morning?" I asked him.

"I can't sleep," he stated. "It's just hard knowing Ronnie left." He looked at me and I folded the note up and put it in my pocket. "You okay, Shayne?"

I was leaned forward with my arms on my knees and looking down at the floor, but I looked up at Damien and said, "Yeah, I will be."

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