Secure The Heart

sth«-»ten

two weeks later | Philadelphia, P.A.

Kelis.

"Do you need anything else?" The waiter questions. I shake my head no while gulping down the mimosa I ordered.

"No thank you, I'm fine." I smile.

"Ok, let me know if you need anything." He smiles, walking off.

"Will do." I mumble to myself, looking around the restaurant. I'm waiting on someone who I asked to meet me here and of course, they're late. I have a flight to catch in a few hours and I don't want to be late. Afternoon traffic is going to be a mess on the way to the airport. I should of left early and waited to do this when I got back, but it had to be done. Sipping my drink, I witness the person that I'm looking for enter the restaurant. Exhaling deeply, I sit the glass down as he approaches my table. I clear my throat and sit up as Jahbrel pulls the chair back and takes a seat. I reached out to him, because the session with Larissa don't go as I planned.

I could sense him holding back for some reason. I know how he feels about psychiatrist and that he doesn't agree with what they do. He always told me that no one can tell you how to feel and he's telling the truth. No one can you tell how to think or feel, but they can give you some advice to move forward. That's what I want to do today. With Larissa being there and just observing us, it didn't feel right. I felt that we needed to have a one on one conversation so he could really express himself. There's also some things I want to make clear and I have a few questions. I should of done this in the first place, but I wanted to make sure he wasn't on some foul shit. Jahbrel sits across from me as we stare at one another. He then opens his mouth to speak.

"Hey." He greets with a small smile.

"Hey, I'm glad you came." I tell him.

"It's only right that I did." He says.

"I hope you don't mind that I'm drinking in front of you. It was something needed in a sense. I don't want to tempt you while we're sitting here though." I explain. Jahbrel shakes his head while narrowing his brows.

"It's cool. I've learned how to block it out and avoid the wanting for it. Anyway, what's up?" He questions as I pass him the glass of water I ordered for him.

"We need to talk about the discussion we had with Larissa." I inform. Jahbrel nods while sitting up in his seat.

"What do you want to talk about exactly?" He questions. As he takes a few sips, I sit up to attention as well.

"It's more like questions on my end. I have so many to ask that I don't know where to begin." He nods while sitting the glass down and staring me in my eyes.

"Whatever's on your mind Kelis, ask it. I'll tell you what you want to know." He assures.

"How long have you been clean?" I question, twirling my straw around in my drink. Jahbrel licks his lips while he looks into my eyes.

"Ten months. This is the longest I've ever been sober. It's still a work in progress." He informs. I nod and cross my legs while sitting up. I knew he had a problem and I tried to talk to him about it, but he always blew me off.

"You know that I wanted to be there for you." He smiles slightly and nod.

"I know, but it was something that I had to do for myself Kelis. In a way, you did help me though. That night we had a huge argument and you cried in front of me, I knew I had to change. Not for you, but for myself. Seeing you express how much you hated me and how I kept hurting you, woke me up. I couldn't keep doing that to you. You didn't deserve it." He says. As he went on, I blocked him out while thinking back on that night. We fought fist with fist and he hit me over my limit. At that point, I just broke down in front of him.