The Truth

Update I guess

So it's been a while since I've written in this, and a lot has happened since the last chapter. In my last post I was talking about my amazing night with my boyfriend, and my best friend. Well since then shit has gone downhill. I won't tell you everything since I'm not ready to admit to myself everything, but I will tell you a lot. First of all, my boyfriend is no longer my boyfriend he is my ex. Shit happened and we broke up...our plan was to stay friends because that's what he wanted, but that didn't happen. Instead he went behind my back and started to talk shit about me to my friends. He would ignore me and whenever we hung out he would leave to group to go off somewhere and sulk or be depressing and ruin everyone's night because one of us had to go and make sure he was okay and get him to come back and rejoin the group. This eventually got really out of hand and me and my friends had, had enough. My friends tried talking to him but it didn't work, he refused to listen. It got to the point where the shit he was saying about me started to affect me and I became really depressed. He was saying shit like, my personality sucks because I'm sarcastic all the time. I don't really get hurt easily, but what he was saying really hurt me, and my friends. Saturday, July 7th, was the last day before I had to leave for a summer camp that lasted a week. Me, my best friend, my bf, and my ex all hung out because my best friend, and my bf wanted to see me before I left. I was having a great time before my bf and my ex showed up, because my ex was being depressing and wouldn't come anywhere near me. I had finally had enough of it and left the pool where we were all hanging out, and went down to the park with my best friend. My bf stayed behind to talk to my ex, but eventually came down to join us and tell us what was going on. Eventually my ex came down to join us although he still avoided us.  Eventually my best friend got tired of it and walked over to the bridge over the creek. I wanted to make sure she was okay so I followed her...she wasn't and I don't blame her. we walked over to the other side of the bridge and sat in the grass, just venting about everything going on. My boyfriend came over to make sure we were okay we said no...my friend and I were still venting about everything and my bf was trying to calm us down. Eventually on of them went over to talk to my ex because I was extremely upset. I got up and went to go sit behind a tree where I took a piece of glass and cut myself numerous times...not enough to bleed, but just enough to feel the pain. My ex, friend, and bf came over and my ex hugged me, which was weird and uncomfortable. He said that he was sorry for everything he said. Not five minutes later he was back to avoiding me and being depressing. This pretty much went on for the rest of the night even after my ex and my bf had to leave for some party. About an hour after I got home my bf called me and said he was going to put my ex on the phone to apologize to me, and said I could say whatever I needed to. He was going to do the same with my best friend. He hung up the phone and called my best friend and she yelled at my ex saying a bunch of shit. After that my bf called me and I blew up on my ex, I was so pissed. After about five minutes of me screaming at him over the phone, he started to interrupt me...this pissed me off even more, so I hung up on them...I had way more I need to say, but I was so emotionally drained I couldn't finish or call them back. The next day I got a video apology from my ex, which was complete bullshit. After watching it and sending it to my best friend, I texted my bf tell him to tell my ex to stop sending me bullshit apologies, and to leave me alone. Of course my ex got pissed which was fine with me, since I didn't want anything to do with him, and couldn't forgive him for what he did to me, my best friend, and my bf. a few hours later I left for camp and had so much fun there. It was nice to forget everything for a week and just be myself for once. Now I'm back home and the bullshit is starting again...I'm hoping it ends soon because I can't deal with it anymore. It's to stressful, and overwhelming, and I'm draining me both physically, and emotionally. If anything happens I'll update this chapter or make a new one, but until then that's pretty much everything I'm willing to tell you for right now. Bye...