Three Doors (A True Story) [Draft]

Chapter 13:

Chapter 13: Door Number 3

     Okay. Here we are, Door Number 3! You ready? Let’s take a peek, shall we?

        In Door Number 3, we have (ironically) three things.

1. A razor

2. A gun

3. A noose

     Get the picture? This door contains self-harm and suicide. You’re very familiar with both. You’ve tried to commit suicide about forty times now (Almost did it about 5-10 times when you’re heart stopped. But they were able to bring you back. Thank the Lord for that) and you hurt yourself almost every day.

     The razor is to cut with. If you cut your wrist deep enough, you could die by just using that (Which didn’t work for you).

     The gun. That gun will only need to fire one shot to end it all. One shot, to the head or to the heart, that’s all it takes. One single bolt to end it all (A shot to the heart didn’t work for you either though. You’re so lucky you’re a freaking Bionic Russian).

     The noose. You could hang it on a your fan or go find a nice tree. Sting it up, and with your necklace of rope (Which didn’t work twice. Seriously, I’m considering calling Russia. They got some explaining to do about their breeding program), I recommend that you quote Romeo.

“Romeo and Juliet, Act 5, Romeo to Juliet, Shakespeare”

“Here, here will I remain

With worms that are thy chambermaids. Oh, here

Will I set up my everlasting rest,

And shake the yoke of inauspicious stars

From this world-wearied flesh. Eyes, look your last.”

     You will begin to remember our last embrace. Then you’ll remember our last kiss, which is your last thought as you seal your doors of breath.

“Come, bitter conduct, come unsavory guide.

Thou desperate pilot, now at once run on

The dashing rocks they seasick, weary bark.”

     Will you think, “Here’s to my love!” as you begin to step off your seat? “A dateless bargain to engrossing death.”  And thus, with the thought of our last righteous kiss… die?

     We both know we probably aren’t going to end up together. In the end, I still want to be with Nick. But sometimes, I do think about Tris in that way. I just can’t decide. You know that, you accept that and I cannot thank you enough for that.

     My love for you will never fade. This is Door Number 3. This is the door you try so often to open. Why, my sweet? Why do you want to leave me?

     You’re my best friend (with some benefits).  Even when the time comes for us to just be best friends, I don’t want to lose you.

     This door is not for you. Please. Please don’t choose it. Don’t be, my suicide boy. Be my sweet, my friend, and my love (In a friendship sort of way). Don’t leave me, Demetri. Please. I beg of you. Don’t leave me!

…

…

…

     That’s Door Number 3 for you. Which one do you choose? Circle in your mind below, please:

Door Number 1

Door Number 2

Door Number 3

Have you decided?

      Okay. I accept your decision, whatever it may be, for better or for worst. But before we finish your book, please read one of my favorite quotes from “A Tale of Two Cities” by Charles Dickens.

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going to direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way---in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for goof or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.” – A Tale of Two Cities, Chapter 1, The Period, page 7

     Why is this one of my favorite quotes? How do I begin to explain? Well … it defines life in a way. It can be the best of times and the worst of times all at the same time. For one person, they could have had the best day of their life, one that makes them want to live and never have an end. For another, they could have had one so bad that they end up taking their own life to speed up their end. It all depends on the person, really.