swim with me? [klance au]

Lo Siento

https://instagram.com/p/BjF37hYHLYd/

"Matt, if you don't go, I'm gonna push you," Shiro said, sounding uncharacteristically mischievous.

"I'm going, I'm going!" Matt yelped, then gulped a breath of air and leaped forward, off the rock shelf, over the waterfall and into the water below with a splash. He surfaced within a few seconds, whipping his hair out of his face and grinning up at the rocks.

Everyone else was lined up on the rocks, waiting to get in. "How's the water?" Allura called down, and Matt flashed her thumbs-up.

"Cold as fuck!"

Allura laughed, behind Shiro. "I might have to push you, eh?" She said softly, leaning towards Shiro's ear. He shivered, feeling her palms soft on his shoulders. With a shove, Shiro was plummeting towards the water, yelling.

Allura doubled over in laughter and Pidge reached up for a high five. One by one, the remaining five jumped down into the water, the three mers remaining with legs, the latex cots secure on their pinky fingers.

Lance was okay at swimming with legs, even if it was a little awkward. He accidentally started a splash fight with Shiro that turned into a full out battle between the seven of them. It ended when Hunk pulled off his cot and splashed the entire group with a gigantic sweep of his wide-finned tail.

The markings on his cheeks glowed orange as he grinned in pride, having won the fight. Luckily, he'd saved his swim trunks, so when he changed back behind some rocks, he had clothes to change into.

From there, the group spread out towels along the shelf of a small swimming hole and laid down in a circle, talking loudly between themselves. Pidge romped through the water with Hunk, searching for "critters" in the water. They ended up finding a frog and naming him Punk, a mix of their names.

Lance sat back, watching everyone talking around him. He almost felt a bit bitter-sweet, and maybe he was just hormonal but he felt tears pricking his eyes. Here he was, surrounded by beautiful people. Humans and mers getting along and having fun together, sharing stories and relaxing. Why couldn't it always be like this? Why'd they have to hide?

There was no hate here. Yeah, Keith might be a little weird, and Pidge was questioning their gender, and Shiro was struggling to find the balance of flaunting androgyny and keeping his masculinity. Matt was just trying to find his place and Allura was taking over a whole village. Hunk just wanted to own a bakery, but they didn't have things like that under the sea.

And Lance? He had so many emotions going on in his heart, he didn't know how to feel. He felt like he was being pulled in hundreds of directions, paths he could take and decisions he need to make. Does he join the war effort and risk his life and his support for his family who needed him? Or did he stay home to take care of them and guarantee their safety? Did he even stay in the village? What if he asked Lotor to change him, just like Romelle? What was going to happen with his father? What was going to happen to his friends on land if he left, and his friends in the village if he stayed?

Lance winced. Looking around, he was suddenly overwhelmed. "Disculpen," he muttered, standing up. He didn't even register that he was speaking Spanish until he was rushing away from the group, followed by worried glances. That happened when he got overwhelmed- Spanish was his panic mode.

And suddenly Lance was on the trail, through the trees and he couldn't breath. His hands were shaking violently, and tears started falling down his cheeks. Panic attack, panic attack, panic attack. Ataque de pánico. What to do, what to do. Holding his head in his hands, Lance gasped for breath, heart pounding.

He hadn't had a panic attack in years, the last time he'd been swimming in a storm with his father and, after accidentally cutting himself on a sharp rock, he became terrified that a shark would smell the blood. His father had had to calm him down, trying anything to help, but it was ultimately Lance who had to find the strength to.

But why was it his job? Lance's teeth chattered and he sunk to the fallen foliage of the ground, heat of the sun beating down on him through the leaves of the trees overhead. Just calm down, Lance. Cálmate.

Back at the swimming hole, Allura was worried, but she reassured the humans that Lance probably just needed to get in the shade for a while. Matt then got them into a conversation about if mers could get a sunburn and so on.

Keith sat on his towel, legs dangling into the water, thinking. He hadn't had a chance to tell Lance that they could only be friends, that it wasn't Lance's fault, Keith just knew that he couldn't have a relationship with a guy, it wasn't... It wasn't something. He just didn't know what that something was. No matter how pretty or funny or odd Lance was, that something was holding Keith back.

And now that Lance was alone, it might be the best time to tell him. Keith stood, brushing off his swim trunks. "I'm gonna go check on Lance," he told Shiro quietly, then headed into the direction Lance went.

He'd only walked a few feet into the woods that lead to the trail when he heard something. Gasping. Heaving. Suddenly worried, Keith walked towards the noise. Deeper into the woods, away from the trail, a figure, several seconds later identifiable as Lance, was crouched on the ground. "Lance?" Keith called out.

He approached slowly until he saw that Lance was crying. Alarmed, Keith closed the distance between them and crouched in front of the mer. Lance was rocking back and forth on his heels, tears streaming down his face. His eyes were closed and his hands were clamped over his ears, shaking. "Lance?" Keith tried again, softer. Lance's breath came fast and hard, and his lips trembled. Keith reached out and laid a hand on his shoulder, making Lance jump.

His eyes were red from tears and his expression had crumpled, hopeless and honestly a bit afraid. "Lance, what's going on?" Keith said softly. Lance uncurled from his position and threw his arms around Keith's neck, sobbing.

The impact of Lance's weight nearly toppled Keith over, but he steadied himself, folding his legs under him as Lance cried. Keith noticed he was shivering, especially his hands so, ignoring of his previous mission of telling Lance his decision about their relationship- if they even had a semblance of one, even a friendship- he gently unwrapped Lance's arms from around his neck and instead pulled him into his chest, cradling him in the valley his crossed legs made, criss-cross applesauce.

"Shhh," Keith hushed softly, and enclosed the hand that wasn't supporting Lance's back around the brunette's shaking fists. "Talk to me," Keith hummed, resting his chin on Lance's head, which was odd because he was the one that was shorter than Lance.

For a minute or two, Lance couldn't talk, and just let out small, incoherent blubbers as he cried. At least his breathing slowed, though. After waiting for him to stop crying, Keith asked again, running the pad of his thumb over Lance's knuckles.

"Lo siento," Lance sputtered, coughing. "Normalmente no soy así." Keith smiled warily.

"What? Lance, I don't speak Spanish." Lance tried to smile, but he just ended up hiccuping.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly, "I'm not normally like this. Panic attack, that's what it was. I'm sorry. Lo siento."

Keith blinked. Lance? A panic attack? He'd never of guessed that Lance had anxiety. "Don't apologize," he said, and suddenly realized their position- him sitting on the ground, legs crossed, with Lance in his lap, face turned into Keith's bare chest. Oh, that's right. Keith blushed- they were both shirtless.

Lance's skin was unnaturally warm and very soft, and Keith could see peach fuzz on his lower stomach. He was still wearing that stupid finger condom on his pinky and his hair was still damp from the water.

Keith looked away. Why was he doing this? He came here to tell Lance he wasn't interested in anything, and now here he was cradling him in his arms, having some sort of bonding moment. Lance's blue eyes shone as he wiped the tears from his eyes.

Keith steeled himself. He had to tell Lance. This meant... He winced, forcing himself to think it. This meant nothing. This was just... this was...

"Lance, this was..." Keith started, determined. But Lance had looked up, and his blue, blue eyes pierced Keith's, so sad and deep. Keith glanced down and noticed that his hand was still over Lance's. He also noticed that Lance had stopped shaking.

And suddenly he couldn't bring himself to say it.