bravery.

Intro

I lay on my bed and chew on my lip as I scroll through tumblr aimlessly. It's unhealthy, how much I'm on tumblr, really. My friends always make fun of me, calling me a hipster and such. Mostly they make fun of the beanie I dont take off. My father gave it to me for my 11th birthday. He died that day. He got into a car accident on the way to my party. He was in fatal condition for the short time he was in the hospital before he died. The doctors say it was a miracle, how long he held on though. He wouldn't let go until I got there. And as soon as he handed my that beanie and told me he loved me, he let go. I'll never forget watching his life slip away. Right before my eyes. I didn't cry until that night, when I was laying in bed. I could hear my mother sobbing and screaming in the living room. I remember shaking uncontrolably, and thats when the first tear slipped. And then I couldnt stop crying. I still cry about it every night, and since that day I only take the beanie off to shower. I sleep in it, I go everywhere in it, and when I used to run, I wouldnt take it off then. I loved running, it cleared my head. But my mums coping mechanism was smoking and drinking. Lots of it. She smoked constantly, and still does. Because of that, I developed cancer in my lungs when I was 13. I can't run anymore. Its hard to breathe, but not impossible. I use an oxygen tank when I have to walk far and when I sleep, just because I would like to not die in my sleep, if possible. They don't think it'll kill me, and it hasn't gotten worse. But they cant promise me anything. But because of my moms excessive smoking, she also has lung cancer. But much worse than mine. And now shes in the hospital, on the verge of death. They say anytime within the next three days she'll be gone. When I was little that would have been my worst nightmare, but my mother in general has become my worst nightmare since my father died. She's totally disconnected herself. And sometimes she takes her pain and anger out on me. Shes only hit me a couple of times, but I feel no reason to report it since, after all, she's dying. I have no other family. No where to stay. No money. But I'll figure that out later.

Our home phone rings and I grab it off the nightstand, pressing the answer button.

"Hello?"

"Hello, is this Louis Tomlinson? This is the clark county hospital."

I sigh and sit up. Here it comes.

"That's me."

"Is your mother Amy Tomlinson?"

"Sure is." I say blandly, and pick at the blanket on my bed.

"I'm extremely sorry to say that she passed away 5 minute ago."

"Thanks." I say and hang up. Well. Now I have to find somewhere to stay. My mother had arranged for me to stay with my aunt, the only other living relative of mine, but that is not happening. She's terrible. Not living with her. I think for a moment before closing out tumblr and opening my email.

Hello. My name is Louis Tomlinson. I'm 17 years old and both my parents are dead. I have no where to stay. I'm not asking for a permanent home, I just need somewhere to stay until I make some money. If anyone is willing to take me in for a short amount of time, please contact me here or call 555 8273.

Once I've finished typing I grab my school directory and pain stakingly type in all the parent/gaurdian email adresses and send the email.

Now to wait.