Can I Have Your Attention Please

Chapter 10: Can't

Before he can see my facial features, I bite down on my lip and lower my eyelashes seductively, looking up at him from my position.
This only seems to arouse him more, and his physical aspects downstairs only proved that further.

He pulls out a condom from his jean pocket. I almost roll my eyes at the fact that he carries one around, but then I remember that he'd wanted this to happen. And it would make me a hypocrite. Because right now, I badly want it to.

Kason stalks toward me and lowers his eyelids darkly. He leans forward right above me, using his forearms by my sides to prop himself up. I feel him just barely graze my own aching area, making me clench my teeth together. It's such a foreign feeling, but it's not bad at all.

Kason noticed my reaction to the touch, smirking evilly. He just barely touches me, eliciting a sound of yearning from me. He chuckles, and I flush a deep red while trying to glare.

"Desperate, are we?" He asks me, looking equally desperate anyway.

"Asshole," I say, voice straining before he smirks and continues.

It's a whirlwind of a new experience. It was too much at first, and I was gripping onto his back for dear life with my nails digging into him in fear of falling into a grave. But eventually it started to feel amazing, and I was tilting my head back and arching my body for more. It was all I needed then.

The whole time, he didn't let up. He wasn't joking when he'd said he wasn't going to let any emotions in. And by that, he meant no babying. No taking it easy just because I'm new. I'm glad he didn't.

When we both finished, he turned his back on the wall nearest to the desk and then leaned his head back as well. We were both breathing heavily, out of sync. He looked at me tiredly.

"Holy shit," He said.

I tried to catch my breath, hands still above my head from when Kason had pinned them there during the high ride. My hair was sprawled upward and messily on the desk as well. Perspiration coated my face underneath the dime lighting.

"Yeah," I agreed. "Holy. Shit."

• * •
MATURE SCENES ENDED
• * •

I try playing an A with my bow pressing against the strings, but I yet again fail epically. It wrenches out a horrible noise, and I groan, putting the instrument and all of my accessories back into its case.

I'm distracted, it seems. It's been two days since Kason and I had some rather rough...intercourse in the janitor's closet. After it happened, he got dressed, gave me one last glare, and left the closet. I haven't seen him since.

Originally I thought that would have been for the best. I didn't want to see him roaming the hallway, and then have this awkward stare down. But now, I can't forget about him. I can't forget about the steamy moments we shared.

But can you blame me? I am - was - a virgin. You don't exactly forget your first time, especially when it's with someone as sexy as Kason. And also especially when the sex is so intense.

However, I think this is a very big problem. Because while we did that act to get each other off of our minds and out of our systems, it only seemed to make me think about him even more. Talk about irony.

And that's not even the worst thing about it. The worst thing is that I'm not just thinking about him twenty-four seven. I'm having sexual fantasies about him. I can't stop replaying our scene out in my head. It makes me feel like some sort of whore for wanting to do it all again.