Nothing Understood

Chapter 18: Into the Ring

Chapter 18: Into the Ring

James watched Jessie and Mike, who were sitting at a picnic table talking about the fundamentals of shifting, from the window over the kitchen sink.

He had just come in from building another shelter for the next clan, hoping to get a nice cold glass of ice water.

His heart beat faster and his face softened as she smiled at something Mike said.

James had no idea what he was doing anymore - he kept catching himself watching her, kept feeling things that made no sense.

He was losing the battle of keeping his feelings his own.

Like when Corey, Mark's right hand, had flirted with her, he had felt rage of a sort he had never experienced before.

It had gotten worse when he had stepped in front of her.

James had barely been able to stop himself from beating Corey senseless!

This completely changed his reason for denying her.

If he felt like that, then how was he going to be able to handle himself when she fought for her place in the pack?

He would murder anyone who dared to touch her, he felt certain.

As it was, he didn't know what he was supposed to do this afternoon, when she would shift and fight.

A small part of him remembered that he hadn't wanted to be forced to feel such things.

He didn't know how he was going to help himself.

Every time she got near him all he could think about was their kiss, and what followed kissing.

He was afraid everyone would see the evidence of what she did to him.

And when she had leaned against his chest...everything had felt just so...right.

He didn't know how much longer he could control himself where she was concerned.

He felt backed into a corner - unless he let his feelings be manipulated by nature, he couldn't do anything.

All he felt he could do where Jessie was concerned was to make sure she had a good chance to defeat the Hunters.

And after they defeated the Hunters?

If he denied her when she asked to join his clan, then what would she do?

Would she leave if she didn't have a reason to stay?

He hadn't thought of that.

He didn't want her to go, but did he really want her to stay?

It would be the end of his struggle with nature, he knew.

There was no way he could resist it for long.

So which did he want to keep the most?

His emotions or her?

"So how can you tell which creature you want to change to? Can I control it or is it something random? Do you just tell yourself 'I want to be a wolf' and you'll change into a wolf?"

I asked Mike, excited about today.

"Slow down. I'm not sure with you. Only Pure Ones teach Pure Ones, which means I was never informed about how your shifts work. I'm hoping its close to how it works for the shifters."

"So I'll have to wing it if you can't help me?"

"I didn't say that. If I can't help you, the Shaman will."