Red vs Blue Season 3: Male Oc

Rvb S3 E9 "It's a Biological Fact"

Tex: The second wall has a guard tower, and an enormous razor-sharp spinning blade.

Simmons: What that thing? It's spinning like two miles an hour.

Leo: Doesn't really look that sharp too.

Tex: I didn't say it'd be hard to get past. After that, we have to pass the gun turrets, and break into the building.

Sarge: And then we attack O'Malley.

Tex: No. That's when we plant, this.

Caboose: ...We're planting a volleyball.

Leo: Um...Caboose, it's a bomb buddy.

Tex: Right.

Caboose: We're planting a volleybomb?

Tex: I've scouted a location inside the base where we can set it off and take the whole place down. I marked the spot with a big X.

Tucker: You scouted it.

Tex: Yeah.

Leo: Wait a second then why are we here?

Tex: What do you mean?

Tucker: He means, if you were able to get past the two walls, the huge spinning blade, the gun turrets, and made it all the way in to the fortress, why didn't you just plant the bomb then instead of putting a big X on the floor?

Tex: (Mumbles) ...I can't carry it.

Grif: What?

Simmons: What was that?

Tex: It's too heavy, okay? You happy?

Grif: Yeah kinda.

Leo lightly punches Grif's shoulder.

Grif: Oww! Sorry!

Tex: I need one of you guys to carry it. I don't have the upper body strength to move it on my own.

Grif: See, girls act like they're so tough, but the first time they need someone to move a couch, who do they call.

Leo: Grif that was extremely sexist.

Tex: ...Agreed.

Grif: Please don't kill me.

Leo: Grif, womens are just as equal as we are, you know.

Grif: Look I'm sorry! I promise I won't say anything sexist again!

Tex: At least I know, Leo's going to get a girl before you Grif.

Leo: (Blush) Thanks, I guess?

Sarge: (walking to the bomb) Ahh, go ahead and kill Grif. We could use the armor for spare parts. Here, this thing doesn't look so heavy, let me (Can't pick the bomb up) t-yooo that thing ain't movin'!

Leo: Wait, let me try Sarge.

Leo walks over to the bomb and lifts it up a couple inches off the ground, before he quickly drops it.

Leo: Dam, that things heavy!

Caboose: I can carry it.

Tex: I guarantee you'll need two people.

Leo: Maybe I should help you, Caboose?

Tucker: Don't worry about him, he's got crazy strength. Church and I think it's God's way of compensating.