Storms {z.m.}

Chapter 31

Chapter 31 - Zayn

"It's good to see you out of the house, sweetheart," my mum tells me as she waters the flowers in the garden. Christine waves at me as she walks in her front door. My mind is still running with thoughts of what has happened since this morning. I run my hand through my hair and let the hood fall off.

"Yeah," I say walking through the white fence. My mind is too consumed on today's events to say anything else.

"I'm sorry you have to go out like that though," she tells me, concern in her eyes. She's gesturing at my hoodie that hides my trademark hair and tattoos.

"I don't mind it much, we do it when we want to go out in public," I say walking up and giving her a hug. She cozies into my arms and takes a deep breath. I don't see my mum often and I can only imagine she misses me more than I miss her.

"I'm glad to see you and Crissy are back to being friends," my mum says in a loaded tone. She does this when she wants someone to elaborate on the topic without sounding nosey.

"Christine, you mean? She's changed, but she's still the same girl somewhere underneath the make-up and tough girl façade," I say taking a seat on the small bench next to the front door although after being scolded so many times as a child I ought to know it's "just for looks." Mum doesn't seem to mind. I know she'll do anything to make sure our little time together is pleasant, which I'm grateful for. When I was younger, I spent almost every hour of the day with my family, which Crissy was considered a part of. Now, it's like they've been ripped out of my life and I have to fill that hole with other things or I'll go mad.

"She took it hard when you left, Zayn. Waliyha and Crissy think I don't notice these things, but I do. It took me a while to realize why she took it so hard, but in hindsight it was staring me right in the face," she says as she strokes the petals of her rosebush. She looks back at me and I look back with an empty stare. I want to hear what she has to say, but I don't want to sound too interested. I don't want my mum to know what happened with Christine and I until I figure out exactly what happened with Christine and I. It's all so confusing.

I know what that kiss meant to me, but whether I want it to be true or not, I also agreed to what that kiss meant to her and I can't take it back now.

"Promise me something," she says looking me in the eyes. She takes a seat next to me on the small bench.

"When you go back to London, when you go back to your life, don't leave her behind. Not literally, I mean, don't forget about her. She loves you so much, Zayn," she says grabbing my hands inside of hers. Mine are much bigger than hers, but it's a habit she's done with me since I was a little kid. That's how I know she's really pleading with me.

Christine made me promise her the same thing less than an hour ago. I didn't have to say a word, kissing her told her anything she needed to know. Now here I am with my hands in between my mum's about to promise her the same thing. It was as if the universe was trying to make sure I didn't back out of this. I felt the pressure of the promise building on my shoulders, but the more I thought about it the more unfathomable it became to not have Christine in my life. Even if it wasn't as a girlfriend, Christine and I would always be friends.

"But if you don't want to give us a chance, then please, for my sake, leave Bradford and don't ever come back, because I can't take it," her words reverberate in my ears and I instantly realize the gravity of what I promised Christine. I know that even though I only promised her a chance, I may as well have promised her the rest of my life because I know that if things end between us, they really do end between us. She'll never want to see me again.