Alone •Shawn Mendes

Chapter 2: Jacks

I looked in the direction of the fridge and noticed a pale blue piece of paper hanging there. I knew when I used to visit, if she had went out, she'd leave a note hanging on the fridge. I walked over to the fridge to take it and quickly checked the fridge to find it quite empty. I guess there was not any leftovers left. I shut the fridge and leaned against the counter as I opened the small note.

Hey Claire and Jack,

I had to leave for work early and I was supposed to go grocery shopping, but I didn't get the chance. Sorry guys! Hey Claire, if you get to this note first, do not starve yourself. Have Jack take you out to eat. If you guys can, can you guys do the food shopping?

Oh and Claire, have Jack drop you off at the AT&T store down at the mall so we can get you your new phone! Meet you there at 2:30

~Love Mom / Aunt Jen.

I placed the note on the counter and shut my eyes for a split second thinking of the many scenarios going through my mind. I knew this wasn't going to be good for me. I wish she had taken yesterday's reaction a clue that this wouldn't be the best of ideas. Aunt Jen doesn't understand that Jack strongly disliked me. He would not take me anywhere.

Jack was a person you could easily and instantly fall in love with. He loves everyone and many liked him. I may not understand why he was being the way he was now towards me, but I knew when no one is around, he won't hesitate to tear me down and speak his mind. My cousin wasn't the type of person to keep quiet and keep things in. He'll speak his mind. We used to be close my freshman year and before that, but things had changed after that night.

I shouldn't starve myself though and I knew Aunt Jen would be home before going to the store. It wouldn't hurt to ask him. He would probably be hungry also. I began to make my way up the stairs and with each step I was getting towards Jack's room, I grew anxious. When I stopped at the door, I heard laughter. It meant someone else was in there with Jack. I knocked on the door and slowly the laughing died down. I waited for Jack for a moment when the door opened and saw my cousin already glaring. I peaked to the side to see G was sitting on a beanbag on the ground trying to figure out who was at the door.

"Eww Johnson. What do you want?" Gilinsky asked frowning once he caught sight of me. I then noticed they had the leftovers from last nights dinner sitting on the table. Just about all of it was gone.

"Go away Claire," my cousin groaned annoyed to see me still standing in front of him. He then looked down to his phone.

"Your mom said to ask you if you could take me out to eat. There wasn't anything in-" I was cut off immediately. It frightened me at first.

"No, I'm not taking you," he frowned looking up at me again. He looked at me as if I was crazy and I felt betrayal as he kept his act up in front of G. I assumed the two of them were sitting in the beanbags at the end of the bed with a game going on and having breakfast. I felt so left out and they were eating the last of the food. How could he say something like that when I implied to him that I was hungry? Who left their guest, who was a relative, hungry? Did he really not care?

This has been the first time in months since I've really talked to anyone around my age. I've shut everyone out of my world for the past few months. I'd thought Jack at least be at least caring after everything I've faced these past few months and at least try to be supporting. It was so clear he had no idea about my parents or he was clearly a cold hearted person. I'm going with the first idea.

"Why do you hate me so much?" I blurted out. G chuckled and my cousin rolled his eyes as he pushed me out of the room and slammed his bedroom door in my face. I faced the shut door for a moment as everything sunk in.

Many emotions ran through me at once as I felt a small tug to my heart. I felt the rejection in my chest as I slowly turned around and felt my eyes beginning to water. I soon had tears trickling down my cheeks and sighed to myself. I moved away from the door and slowly made my way over to my temporary room and closed the door. It was quite a cool spring morning here in April. It wasn't exactly a go out and wear only your shorts and tee-shirt kind of weather. If I were back in New York right now, there would still be snow on the ground and I'd be wearing my boots, long turtleneck along with my heavy coat and jeans with scarf to keep me warm. Still, my immune system wasn't the strongest.

Technically if I were back home, I'd probably be in school. It would be towards the end of third period. I was taking college courses this year, which meant I would be taking AP exams when I get back. I had learned that I no longer had to be there in order for me to take the exam. As long as I prepared for everything on my own, I'd be okay. I had decided last year that I wanted to graduate a year early and so technically I didn't have to go to school at the moment. I was waiting to take my exams in may and for graduation day in june. I mentally shake my head not wanting to think about that now.

The only place I remember knowing how to get to on my own would be the mall. It has been years since I have taken the bus. Would Jack really make me travel on my own when I don't quite know my way around? I knew I couldn't wait here and starve myself. If Jack wasn't going to do anything, then I'd have to do it on my own.

The thought of Sam sounded like a good idea. Maybe I could call Sam Wilkinson to take me to the mall? Realization hit me again. He has always been the nicer one of the three of them after the incident, but I had no way of contacting him. We were never that close, but we always exchanged smiles and a few words whenever Jack and G weren't around.

Smiling... It seemed so long ago since everything was normal. I used to smile all the time and people told me I had the best smile. Some told me that I would be voted the best smile. The last time I could remember that I really smiled would be that day before I found out. It was that day I was going to have my performance. Everything about that time brought shock and pain to me that it had affected my performance since. Since that day, I never found a reason to smile again.

Returning back to reality, I mentally sighed for my antisocial mess. This was something that would happen when you always kept to yourself. I always found it difficult to talk to other people. My stomach grumbled once again and I quickly changed into a pair of jeans and a shirt; putting a sweatshirt over. I slid on my flats and looked around the room for my wallet before making my way out. I guess I could take a bus up to the mall. I hope nothing has changed dramatically over the years here.

The clock in the living room read ten minutes past ten. I had plenty of time to get to the mall and eat. Maybe once I've found something to eat, I could go to the music store then after, I could meet my aunt Jen at the phone store there. The thought of music made my heart swell as it was the one and only thing I felt I could still connect to. It was the only thing that was keeping me sane at the moment and the only reason I am ready to face reality again. Making music and playing pieces I love has made an impact to my life. Without it, I wouldn't be so sure now if I would be ready to come back to earth and live out the rest of my life. My cello and music in general has been my rock.

Maybe I could get a few new pieces and learn them. I haven't done that since before my music auditions. It may help me get back into things. I opened the front door of the house and felt the rush of cool air hit my exposed skin. I stepped out and scanned the streets and observed the street. I closed the door behind me and took a deep breath as I began walking in the direction of the bus stop.

There weren't too many times where Jack and I had to catch the bus. When we did, it was only because Aunt Jen couldn't take us or she would be at work and we'd leave the house. In my hopes, I hoped I wouldn't have to wait for the bus too long. I was soon approaching the bus stop at the end of the street and saw it completely empty. Cars drove by and it was quiet out here. I stood at the stop now shivering slightly. Should have put on an extra layer. I should have taken Jacks keys. It would have been a lot better than waiting out here. A part of me also knew that he wasn't going to give up his keys. I'm pretty sure he wouldn't let me borrow his car either. I groan slightly as I looked down the road and to my luck, I saw the bus coming.