The pain that doesn't go away

Vanessa's pov;
Each day that goes by is a day closer to the day where I will finally do it. I will let go of my sorrow. I will let go of everything that hurts me. I will let go of this life. All this built in pain and anger has turned me into someone who I didn't know could possibly exist. I didn't know that people were so cruel to the point where they take normal females like me and turn them into a disaster. They're like a volcano. Waiting to erupt. Slowly but surely, they will take each and every step to hurt you. To sting you. Like a bee almost. They spit words at you like fireballs. They make you wonder why you were put on earth in the first place. They are the reason that most people don't survive high school. Some people kill themselves at the youngest age. And then people start to regret how they made them feel.

I'm vanessa gray. A freshman in a private school. I've just started high school and I've already started going to therapy. I started the year off thinking that I could be a normal teenager but I didn't know that the stress could be this bad. The people were bad. I'm totally screwed for the next three years. I have no where to go and no one to go to. No one understands me. They don't understand the pain I feel. They say it's self inflicted but it's not. It's all the pain built up from a few years. I've seen my brothers fight, my brother almost died right in front of me. My other brother had an anxiety attack in front of me. My mom had cancer. And now that leaves me with depression and anxiety. My dad has diabetes (that's nothing compared to the rest) my sister doesn't have any issues and to top on to that. My dog passed away. The one thing that kept me happy. The one thing I could cry to. She's gone. I'm all alone.

I thought that maybe when high school started that I could finally be at peace but all the drama from middle school followed me. It's like a never ended cycle of torture. Make it stop already just make it stop.