Blue Side

3

He stared at the Headstone, disbelief set in his eyes and heart as he saw his boyfriend's name engraved into the stone. His late boyfriend, to be cruelly correct.

He felt the ugly clench at the back of his throat and the watery-outline of his vision, as he held back his tears. He placed a hand on his mouth, in response to the hard and painful truth displayed in his vision.

"Hi Tae.." he said softly. Putting a smile on his face despite the painful tugging at his heart. "How have you been?"

"It's been quite a year hasn't it?"

Yoongi said nothing. But he knew that even if he said nothing, Yoongi was actually supporting him.

But he felt those old emotions. Those old and horrible emotions he had long gone moved on from, slowly bubble up to the surface once again.

"I didn't think I'd ever find the will, the motivation, to ever come back here. Not by myself anyway.."

He took a shakey deep breath. His grip tightening on Yoongi's hand.

"But I did.. And I don't even know what to say.."

He felt the tears prick at the corner of his eyes. Trying to keep his voice calm and normal.

"But honestly.. I miss you.." And he broke down once those three last words left his mouth.

"Why Tae??!" He yelled now. "WHY DID YOU HAVE TO GO?!!"

Yoongi held him as he struggled in the other's arms. The situation reminiscent to one mirrored over a year ago. But this time, his mind was at least sane and clear.

"It- It..! IT WASN'T FAIR!" He didn't care if he looked like a mess. But he needed to get this off his chest.. "We were suppose to get married!! Adopt a daughter, be together, watch her grow up, travel the world and grow old together.."

He let the tears stream down his face. Letting the memories they never got to live, only within his imagination, as they flashed in his head.

"Why.." he said sobbing now. "Why.. Why..."

His legs slumped him. Yoongi catching him easily. He let himself cry his frustration and sadness once again out.

He didn't know how long he cried. 5 minutes, an hour, he didn't know. But he did know, Yoongi never once let him go. Allowed him to cry on his shoulder while his tears wracked his body.

"I know how much it hurts.." Yoongi's voice finally spoke again. Into Hoseok's shoulder. Letting Hoseok let it all out. "I Understand that loss is unfair.."

"But.."

He knew it would be cruel. But he also knew that he needed to say it, or Hoseok would just fall back into slump once again.

"You need to move on.."

He heard Yoongi say. The other placing an assuring hand on his shoulder for comfort while he cried. Stairing at the the flowers he placed below the stone.

"I know..", Hoseok said while wiping his tears.

"I just can't believe it's been a year.."

Forgive me Taehyung.. he said before pulling the sobbing male into his arms and hugging the brunette deeply. But I can't see him suffer any more..

"The ones we love don't go away.. they walk beside us everyday.. Unheard.. Unseen.. but always near, still loved, still missed very grately.."

He let himself say just that. Let Hoseok cry. Let he himself to hold the other even closer and tighter.