When It Snowed

Chapter 32 - I Always Will

Staring at the young girl, Finley was careful to keep her cool. It was a feeling that she had been experiencing the past 70 years. She felt like a lab rat, out of control of her own body- only this time, it was for a good reason. T'Challa's sister carefully took apart the metal arm that Hydra had installed. Stark did a number on it, and after a few diagnostics, it was clear that it would just be easier to let them build her a new one.

So, Bucky gave them the green light.

In the background, behind a glass window, Bucky stood side by side with T'Challa observing the way the two women interacted. Of course, the younger one was talkative, sweet, and innocent. Finley however, she remained quiet and what looked to be a little timid as the girl worked.
That was what bothered the King the most. She was too hesitant about his younger sister, scared almost.

"From the stories I heard of the Winter Soldier-" He began gathering Bucky's attention. "-I pictured her to be more ruthless, violent, not-"

"Like this?" Bucky finished for him.

Nodding, the King let out a long breath.

"I don't know who the Winter Solder was, but this definitely isn't Finley."

"Finley." The King repeated her name. "Please, enlighten me."

The thought of the past Finn made him smile. It was like a time machine, Bucky took himself back to the times before the war. "I met her back in the 40's. She saved Steve from getting beat up for the hundredth time." Chuckling and shaking his head, Bucky stuffed his hands into his pockets. "She was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen." His voice became raspy. "But she was the type of girl I just couldn't have."

"Why not?" The King looked to him.

"Finn was complicated." He looked back to her. "She had a hard life and an even harder personality. Nothing could get to her, not even me. It took weeks for her to even hold a conversation with me, but once she did- I started to see the real her."

"The real her?" The King observed the way he stared at her.

"The real Finn was quiet, observant, kind, but heartless at the same time." He chuckled. "She was everything I ever wanted. But no matter how hard she tried to hide it, I could always see that she was scared of something." Immediately his eyes started to burn. "She was scared of me."

"You?"

Bucky nodded. "Finn was scared of commitment. So many people had left her behind before us, and Steve and I just ended up doing the same thing. She helped us get into the army, she helped us become the soldiers that we are today. So when we shipped out, we just left her back in Boston. We knew that she was tough, that she could handle things on her own- but I didn't want her to."

The King was trying to understand. "So you went back for her?"

"No." Bucky shook his head. "I couldn't. Steve did, thank god... I was captured behind enemy lines, transported to a Hydra base and kept as a prisoner of war. I thought I was as good as dead, that I would never be able to see her again."

"You thought of her?"

"Every second of every day. About how I just left her, about how she probably thought I abandoned her, how I was never coming back for her. It was my fault, but I used it. I used it to keep going, to keep fighting, to keep my promise. To make it back to her."

"And did you?"

"Nope.." Bucky smiled. "She came for me."

This seemed to take T'Challa back. To continue, Bucky first let out a laugh. "No official military training, no survival lessons, no rank, nothing. Her and Steve broke into the facility and got everyone out- even me. She thought I was dead- so when I saw her-" He smiled again. "When I saw her it was like nothing else mattered." His throat tightened again. "The three of us, we were inseparable. Nothing could hurt us as long as we had each other. So, when I lost her-" Bucky breathed through his emotions. "It was like the whole world went with her."

"What do you mean, you lost her?"

It was hard to form the words, but Bucky did it anyway for the King's sake.

"We had a routine recon mission. Hydra train, a few guards, nothing special on the report. We had to tag the weapons, get in, and get out. When we got there though, it was so much bigger than we anticipated. There were too many crates, to many weapons to match the report we were given. Next thing I know, the door between us closes and I'm trapped in one of the weapon cars; Steve and Finley on the other side." His eyes became hazed over, and T'Challa knew that he was reliving the moment. "A Hydra soldier was in there with me, and he started laying down some fire. I took cover, countered back, but it wasn't enough. He had a total advancement with his weapon. It was like a cannon of pure energy, kind of like Tony's suit. I kept away from him, I knew I couldn't win with what I had. Then I heard the door bust down, and all of a sudden Steve and Finn were in the car with me. They came back for me. I tried to warn them, to tell them to get out. I was too late though. The agent blasted his next shot their way. Steve put his shield up and it threw him across the car and towards me."

T'Challa swallowed hard seeing the tear fall from Barnes' eye. "Steve and I were toast, we should have been. He had us in his sites, we were the ones that were supposed to die. But all of a sudden she was there. Finn picked up Steve's shield, stood between the two of us, and took the hit." He sniffled and looked to his feet. "Blasted her right out the side of the train." By now, he sighed away his emotions and closed his eyes using a higher voice. "I still don't know how, but she managed to grab onto a bent railing. I climbed out after her, reached as far as I could. Her fingertips, I had her fingertips in my hand- but then the bar gave way." It was like his heart had broken all over again. "And she fell, all I could do was watch her fall. Until eventually I blinked, and she was gone."

Looking away for a moment, T'challa gathered himself before pursuing. "She survived the fall?"

"Somehow. Right after she did though, a white out passed through. Search parties were sent out, but nothing turned up. She was gone- Hydra got to her first." regret washed over Bucky's face as he shook his head. "I should have gone after her right away, I should have jumped off that damn train and went after her... But I didn't. So what she is now, what she's been through-" he whispered looking towards her. "-It's my fault."

The remorse in the air was so thick you could cut it with a knife.

It wasn't Bucky's fault, and T'Challa knew that.

"You're Finley, she had a strong heart to do what she did. It's the same heart that's still beating now." Bucky looked to him. "She will return to you, that I promise. How long it will take, I'm afraid I cannot tell you. But she will, we have the technology and environment to allow her to do so. Whatever you need, just ask."

Smiling, Bucky gratefully nodded. "Thank you your highness."

In return, the King nodded before making his way towards the exit.

Before he was gone however, T'Challa stopped where he was and turned to face Bucky one more time. "Mr. Barnes?" He asked. Looking back to him, Bucky waited for him to continue. "Did she love you?"

All he could do was stare at the King, a sad look on his face falling immediately. "I loved her."

"And do you now?"

Licking his lips, Bucky didn't bother to look at her. Instead, he took a breath nodded. The King didn't need another response other than the one he was about to receive. It was what really mattered to him, it was all he needed to know to understand just why Bucky was willing to go through all this trouble for the Hydra assassin before them. It was because she was more than just an assasin, she was a good person, someone who was scared and trapped in a shell of a body that just wasn't hers. He would break her free though, he had to; because nobody else could. "I always will."